Bruce's 3 year anniversary
OK: so I have read all of your posts and blogs, responded when I felt I had something intelligent to say and now just have to get down to business. I was hoping it would be late enough to just say good-night! LOL
Today was Bruce's third year anniversary. I usually read the paper while he has breakfast and today I said so what is today.
His response "First day of spring, and the the three years after my stroke." This is not on any calendar or list here. He knows it because tomorrow our niece and Godchild will be 21 and she was here, celebrating her 18th with her sister and Mary Beth.
Bruce slept well. After the time on the bicycle yesterday, he was tired last night. The warm weather didn't help early on, but as it cooled down, he did sleep. He got up at his usual 5:30am, me at 7am and this was about 7:30am. I asked him how he felt. He said he wasn't scared, did not remember most of it and then moved on to what was on the day's list. I so do wish he could share his thoughts and feelings more, but in a way, am glad he just seemed to accept and acknowledge it and then move on.
I wasn't sure how well he could move today. The truck went back to the shop yesterday-a continuance for another time-and Bruce has to do more work to get in and out of the Honda. But he was up to it. Got some treats. We even went to Home Depot for the gutter-leak stuff. Normally he could spend hours there but now knows that anything he buys, he can't really do so was agreeable to just going for a ride. Lunch, nap and then Cathy and me off to work. He waited up for me, we talked a bit and then off to bed. I will go in shortly to medicate and close the window.
I hesitate to list the ups and downs of the last three years. Part of me can't believe it has been three years! You have all followed Bruce's recovery. I think Bruce mourns the emotional-cognitive loss more than the physical. He often talks of our marriage-planned for the first day of Summer, but on March 5th, had suggested March 22nd-first day of Spring. He hates not finding his words and not being able to function at the same level at work. Not being able to get through a book without rereading a chapter to see where he left off, or sharing a current best seller with his buds. These are the things he misses.
Yes, he can do most of his own shower, can put on a shirt, can steer himself to Rehab or through the Grocery store, but that is not his love-his reason for being.
Mary Beth comes tomorrow for the weekend. Second daughter Melissa joins us on Saturday for her first Spring baseball tournament. Plan to have dinner with the brothers and of course, our Brittany and Izabella. I am sure Mary reminded them all of the importance of this weekend. People have so such on their plates. Elizabeth called today. Funny, she is so into her own life and Mary probably prodded this. I would never want her to equate her birthday with Bruce's stroke and I told Mary this. My best friend called and cards from many, that was precious.
I think maybe best to keep the stroke low key. Concentrate on Melissa's tournament, dinner with family and stick to routine as best we can. He is already working on Sunday's grocery list and knows tomorrow is paperwork and house cleaning for our guests. Cathy did a lot today here in the main house. I will have to do guest rooms and BR in the upstairs. But Bruce said tonight he would like to wash the living and dining room floors-we have that new Swiffer Wet cleaner and he can certainly handle that-but you have to love the thinking! So low key-family coming and prep needed. He tells me every day he loves me and smiles. That makes every day worth it! Debbie
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