In the town I live, we have one of the largest marathons in the country. Grandma's Marathon has been run every year since around 1977 (I think) and I have been in 3 of the half-marathons. Some knee trouble has caused me to miss the last few, but with a little ortho surgery, I am ready to start training again. I never was what some would call a hard-core runner. The most mileage I would run while training was about 8 miles. I had no trouble completing the 13.1 miles for the race. For a big guy, finishing in under 2 hours was quite an accomplishment for me. I'm 6'1", around 230 lbs. Running was a great release.

Now, I can't seem to find the time to fit it in. Even running 3-5 miles, which would only take 30-40 minutes seems impossible. There are so many other thing I need to do now. I think I need to prioritize what I have going on and find more time to myself.

Enough about me, on to Lisa. As I said, I started this to keep track of what I am thinking and my feeling through all of this. I told Lisa I started an "online diary" as she calls. She wants to read it, but I said she could read this when things are better for her.

Her "real food" went well when I posted yesterday. Later that night, it decided to make a re-appearance. I don't know if it was the texture, maybe the spices, or just the difference in food that caused her to throw it up. It's not easy to watch the person who I love so deeply be so sick. To tell her she has to stay up when she is so uncomfortable all she wants to do is go back to bed. To tell her to "Just go" when there is no way the staff will make the bedpan in time. To watch her sleep most of the day because she is so exhausted and needs to. It's hard. The hardest thing I've ever done. And, easily, the hardest thing she will ever do.

Makes a marathon seem simple.

Butch