moan...sorry
Sometimes it is hard not to moan. I know I no longer have Ray to look after but also I now no longer have someone to look after me. The kids have gone back to their lives and I welcome that but it leaves me without those advisors that helped me get through the caregiving part of my life so well.
Disaster struck here at home yesterday when I was away having a "day out" with Pamela and her children. I had had the little ones over night because Pamela had an early medical appointment yesterday morning. In return she had promised us all lunch out at one of our favourite spots. The morning tea was packed and we went to a nice park the kids love, with lots of climbing equipment etc and had it there. Then we went on down to The Entrance and went over to a water feature which is like a shallow wading pool with small statues and waterspouts in it where the boys could enjoy waterplay for a while. Tori could just read her book in peace and listen to her music as she often does here.
Pamela went off to get lunch and the boys played in the dry area. While she was gone storm clouds came over. She had just got back when suddenly torrential rains and strong winds swept down on us. The little ones screamed, it was so frightening. The crowds vanished, running back to their cars. As it eased off we did too, ran back to the car and started heading for here and our delayed fish and chips. But when we drew into the driveway my next door neighbour hurried to the car to tell us my cabin/shed up the back had lost it's roof in the bluster and it was all over his back yard. What a shock that was.
Pamela, being a sensible person, said to ring Emergency Services and then the Insurance company.Thank goodness for the great men and women from Emergency Services, they came, six of them, and secured my house roof that had lost some capping and put a canvas over the damaged part of the cabin roof. Today an assesor came and looked at the damage and will "be in touch". So I see my Spring and Summer fading into getting the roof back on, cutting down some trees now listed as "dangerous" and generally tidying up so that future storms do not do any further damage.
I think the new house on the western (bottom) side prevented my carport roof from shredding, being higher than my house, so something good came out of it. But the reshaping of the landscape also alters wind patterns so I don't know if this is a one-off or whether it will be repeated. That certainly gives me an uneasy feeling. I feel so dangerously alone sometimes. I know so far I have dealt with everything that comes my way but I do dread the day when something comes along that I cannot handle. It has left me with some very shakey feelings, I do feel so much more vulnerable as a widow. I am so far still seeing it as another change in life forced upon me, another uncertainty about life and my ability to handle it.
Okay, rant over.
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