it just goes on and on and on…..
I feel stuck in a time zone or a groundhog day zone….. dan is back to his depressed self… ignoring the world and laying mute, eyes closed… etc… the house feels like a funeral home… even with kids running and playing and laughter-- Dan can still just bring us all down…. Why can't anything just be good - or good enough, why must we in our family constantly deal with the depression… we have enough to do with the stroke, now the depression is around and just sucks the life right out of everyone… in light of robin williams depression and suicide - one does ask , if that man couldn't over come how does anyone? and i look at dan and i shoe my head and i just want to cry… not only for the loss of the man i love.. and yes i still love this dan but in a different way… but the loss of time we still continue to lose every single day, that this depression rules…. i am close to just banging my head on the wall and getting my own TBI -- grrr- i won't do it … to much to take care of…. as always - sarah pointed it out how we no more than sit down and something else you got to do happens...
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