i got some help
Thank you so much for the comments that were left on my last entry. I dont even remember what I said in that entry. All I remember was I wanted to die and I was tired of trying everything and not getting better. I knew the increase in my keppra plus experiencing the seizures were causing anxiety and psychogenic seizures but I just got so fed up with the anxiety and psychogenic seizures that I went back to my old dose of keppra about a month ago with hopes that the depression/mood changes would not come back as a side effect.
Unfortunately I began dealing with depression on top of the anxiety which was exactly what I was hoping wouldn't happen. I was so sick last Monday, I called my dad and he took me to the emergency room. I was pretty much on 24/7 suicide watch for about 3 days until I could talk to a doctor, then I was moved to an actual behavioral health center. We did group activities and I met some very nice people in there for different reasons. My dad visited everyday and I just got out today and am back at his house until I feel okay enough to go back to my apartment.
I was diagnosed with major depressive disorder and panic disorder with agoraphobia. I am now taking prozac and my clonapin was increased again. My psychiatrist also told me stop getting in bed so early. At my apartment I would be so tired of having a bad/boring/stressful day, I would shower and get in bed at sometimes 6:00 in the evening then not get up until around 9am when I took my medicine so my psychiatrist (from the sleep center) said I will sleep better if I don't spend so much time in bed before I go to sleep (which I already knew).
My therapist while I was there made a referral for me to be in a program that will pick me up and take me places I need/want to go. I also want to try to do some volunteering until I feel stable enough to work. I don't really want to go into detail about how I feel and my crazy experience this past week so Im just going to leave it at that.
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