Isolation
I am a caregiver, so of course, I understand them better than survivors. It's what I know. Lately it seems, we have all been having feeling of not being noticed. It feels to me like isolation.
But, some of it I bring on myself. I know I do it. I have to do it. Case in point, my daughter and I decided to go out to dinner last night. It was way too hot to make anything and we have a great time when the 2 of us are alone. We enter the restaurant and see a friend of mine that I used to coach hockey with and haven't seen in months. He waves and asks us to join him.
Now, we both know that all we are going to talk about is Lisa. I know people are concerned and have questions, but that's all people ask us about. Not how are YOU or what have YOU been up to. Everybody I see.
Lisa has a website that is updated every day. People always say, "I saw on Lisa's website that...". Then if you know what is going on, why ask me about it? I hate to say it, but it gets annoying talking about my wife all the time. It's hard enough to, for just a minute, find an excape from what I am dealing without being reminded at the drop of a hat.
We turned down his invitation and sit by ourselves. We had a very nice dinner together. She is a "Daddy's Girl" and, even though she's only 15, has been my best support for the past months. I don't think I could of made without my little girl. As we were walking out, she said to me, "Thanks for not sitting with them. I couldn't take about mom all night."
I couldn't either baby.
Butch
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