the empty paper bag
"HI everyone. Boy have we got a full program today. Here are the highlights. Now, how would you like to tell us about your week?"
So started today's Stroke Ed group meeting. Exciting eh?
Then we run through the program a step-at-a- time. Some of it is quite good, quite interesting, quite well-balanced. But it is all words, words, words. I for one feel as if nothing goes into the program that will actually help. When the stroke survivors or caregivers are giving imput the caring professionals nod but the answers are the same old herrings: take care of yourself, learn to lift correctly, get plenty of exercise, get plenty of sleep.
Now we come to the HOW, or maybe that is HOW THE H**L, of the matter. If I am going to care for Ray for 24/7/365 how exactly am I going to get to exercise more, relax more, get some of my old life back? How am I going to act as motivator for my survivor, do the inside and outside work, keep up a social and spiritual life, keep up with friends and family etc, etc?
One of our survivors is a Veteran and his carer gets two days a week one-on-one care for him so she can lead a bit of a life, of course she also has a four year old so I am not saying she has it easy. The other three survivors are much less physically handicapped than Ray, although two live alone so have their own set of problems with that.
Two of the survivors and one carer seem to have dropped out of the program and I can see why; for it to be of use to us it has to be relevant. It has to actually improve the life of the carer or the survivor or preferably both. It has to stimulate thought and motivate action. There have to be practical applications to add to the theoretical lectures. With two more weeks to go maybe they are saving the best till last?
I once did an exercise in class called "The Empty Paper Bag." It was about a little boy who came late to a party. The hostess was giving out presents and the first children in line got some fine gifts, the children further down the line got some okay stuff but could have been happier but the little boy who came late got an empty paper bag. At the end of the story which was a marking essay I asked the class what they thought the boy should do with the bag. Some people said he should ask the hostess for some party goodies to take home. Some said well that was silly because everyone should get leftover party goodies. A couple of girls said that if it was them they would go straight home (out of shame or embarrassment I presumed).
The answer I liked best came from one of the mischief makers of the class. He said the boy should blow up the paper bag, hit it to make it "pop" and then grab what the other kids dropped!!
I guess we all get handed an empty paper bag sometimes, and each of us has to decide for ourselves what to do with it.
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