After long life together, empty nesters drift apart
This subject comes from the Dear Abby pages and when we throw in a stroke for either spouse we get a picture of why some couples are ready to throw in the towel. You know Dear Abby is distributed by Universal Press Syndicate for many home town news papers.
This story caught my eye because the husband's name was "Fred".
Dear Abby: My husband and I have been married for 35 years. The first 30 were pretty much devoted to raising children. Now that we are both retired and empty nesters, I realize just how focused our lives have been on family issues.
While I have developed many interests, "Fred," has none besides solitary activities. He isn't interested in most of the things I enjoy, but offer no alternatives. Consequently, I've learned to make social plans that do not include him.
I do spend a good deal of time at home with him, but I am feeling increasingly detached. I would like to have more of a life with Fred, but I must give up the relationships and activities that have provided a needed balance in my life in order to revive our marriage? ...Mrs .couch potato
Dear Mrs. couch potato: And what's to guarantee that if you give up your friendships and activities that your marriage will be "revived"? Marriage is about compromise. Before this situation goes any further, you and Fred should talk to a counselor about the state of your union.
People who are anti-social may be extremely narrow in their range of interests, or they could be depressed. I'm advising you to find out now into which category your husband falls before you sever your social contacts. End of Abby's answer!
From my experience once we get the outside social taste in our minds it's hard to overcome when we have a survivor at home, I applaud the care givers and survivors for staying together as their vows dictated. When I read this story I remembered so many stories here along the same lines.
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