ONE SMALL STEP
Entry posted by jjohnson
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Friday ended up being a day which I never imagined would or could happen. I had invited Mary, the friend that I have been mentoring since her stroke. Her Birthday was on the big snow blizzard day and we had to cancel our plans to celebrate so we had rescheduled for the next day that would be nice. I had planned all sorts of special surprises for Mary. The day was quite warm yesterday, 60 degrees. How can we go from blizzard to 60 in one week? Go Figure. Well, I took my shower and got dressed and decided I was going to sit on the front porch. It was beautiful outside. A day of endless possibilities. As I sat there thinking and talking to God, I decided ..... You know Jan you are doing good with your food plan, you've lost weight, now the only thing that would truly top everything is if you could take a walk. I do need to put exercise into my daily life .. Now, mind you, I was 100% paralyzed after my Brain Stem Stroke, told I would never walk again, etc. I can manage baby steps in my house, but for long term walking, etc. like going to the mall and such, I must use my wheelchair, The more I rocked in my rocking chair on the porch, the more I had the urge to go for a walk. I kept talking to God and saying well, you know God, what is the difference if I'm walking in my house vs the street, then it hit me.....
When you fall in the house, you have the rug to fall on, if you fall on the street, it's harder .....
Then I thought, nothing ventured, nothing gained. Besides, God is carrying me. So, I kept having a showdown in my mind and thoughts. Should I try walking down my ramp and enter the freedom of the free world, the street?
I decided, I will try and if it gets to hard, I will just go back to the safety of my rocking chair on my front porch. I want to regain my Independance.
There, I did it, I'm on the driveway...... My new neighbors came out for a smoke, I said hi to them and there I went. I went to the left of the street. I took my first two steps....ok, I'm off the driveway and I am actually standing on my street. I took a few more baby steps, then out of no where I hear:
MISS JAN, MISS JAN, MISS JAN, MISS JAN, MISS JAN, MISS JAN, WOW, MISS JAN........ WHAT YA DOING?
I said, Hi there Julianna, it was Debbie, my dear Bible Study Partners Granddaughter, I said I'm going for a lil walk, You want to join me, just then There was a Lady I have never seen before with a stroller and inside the stroller was Colton and Ethan, Julianna's brothers, Debbie's Grandsons. I said hi to them as well. Julianna asked her babysitter if she could go with me. She looked at me, I started to laugh and I said, oh believe me, I'm not doing a marathon or anything, This will be the first walk I've taken outside of the house in five years. She looked at me and I explained my situation. She said, sure Julianna, I'll just be taking the boys for a quick stroll.
Off we went, I felt such freedom actually leaving my house, First things first however, I said to Julianna, if I should fall, or need help, please go and get Mr. Wayne OK? She said OK and that she knew which house was mine.
All of a sudden, five little girls ran up to Julianna, guess they were her "possee" and said, hey what ya doin? She said going for a walk with my friend, Miss Jan. Can we go with ya? She looked at me and I said SURE, the more the merrier. As I started walking, ... I got in the position where I could see that Julianna was copying the way I walk and I said hey, what ya doing? She said walking like you so you won't feel funny. I guess I can be seen as different. I just started laughing and she said what is so funny Miss Jan. I said well, sweetie, I guess I do kinda walk like a lil baby learning to walk for the first time don't I. But, you know what, at least I am walking. That is such a gift from God.
Julianna was my eyes, I didn't realize God had sent her to accompany me for my special walk, I would hear from time to time, Miss Jan, move to your right, there is a car coming, one time there was a UPS truck coming. She was such a big help. I may have only gone about to the end of the street and back, I DID IT..... WOW, you would have thought I had walked a thousand miles, What Joy, Excitement...... What gratitude I felt. What a gift was given to me...
I was tired, really tired. But, it was a good tired.
Julianna felt so good as well, she rejoiced and said, Miss Jan, look you did it. I said, well, sweetie, God sent you to help me and it was fun talking to your friends. I invited her friends to stop by any time they see me on the front porch. I love children and it was fun speaking with them. Having my mind on things other than stroke, having some type of newness other than living stroke 24/7.
Wayne didn't know I had or was doing this. It was a spur of the moment kind of thing. He had a tizzy when he found out. What the hell did you try something like that for? You should have told me. etc. etc. etc.
He said, well how was it? I told him it was scary. But, I was in good hands.
He said, well, once the weather gets nicer, maybe you, me and Harley could go for walks. He said he didn't think I could take Harley with me as he will throw me off balance. But, that is my goal, to take the leash and say "Harley, wanna go for a walk with Mommy".. I have often thought that. Well, Today is Harley's Birthday and I am taking him for a walk by summer.
Who knows what else in store for me. There are always dreams to come true.
Today is Harleys special day so we are going for a ride ...... and he will get an extra treat today.
What challenges ..... Each new day is full of possibilities.
Will write more later. Got to go and get my shower ... I want to sit outside, another beautiful day.
Oh, I had called Debbie, when she answered, I said, hey, guess what I just did, she said SHE BEAT YOU TO IT..... YOU WENT FOR A WALK, hehehe She said Julianna already beat you to it and told me all about it. She was so happy for you and her lil friends adored you. Could not believe a lil child would take time from playing with her friends to call her Grandmother to tell her what she did, helping me .... That really touched my heart.
Believe In Miracles And SOAR :happydance:
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