Willis

9 hours ago, HostTracy said:

I am so much better at slowing down to smell the roses as they say.

 

❤️

So nice how we understand what it's like to have this in our lives now. Very comforting to know I'm not the only one or alone! You Aussie's are awesome!

YES I like that kind of stuff and those sayings. I have seen it said so many ways and they are all very helpful. I shared your comments about being a couple now as opposed to before our strokes with April, my wife. We both could relate to my feeling with your description. Thanks for that. I don't think we get that show in the US but with streaming. these days I guess everything is available one way or another.

 Damn it Becky like so many of us feel from time to time. "Wasn't this stroke enough?" We all have found strength we didn't know was there and had to dig deep to find. Way to go! Before I stroked I knew someone that had shingles and they warned me how bad it can be. I got vaxed back then right away pre 2016. I think at the time it was 2 shots and at least 6 months between the 2. Wishing you a continuing recovery.

15 hours ago, heathber said:

I'm not in a position where I can retire yet, the first couple of years post stroke wiped out my savings, just as well my super is/was preserved and Is still intact. I now get NDIS funding for therapy and basic supports which means I'm no longer going backwards financially, but reality is I'm not going to be able to retire early as I had once hoped to do.

I'm 9 years off standard retirement age.

On the bright side I currently have a very helpful and accommodating employer, so working is not as much of a burden as it might be.

 

Pam I so get that breakdown at the front desk. That was me before I started on the meds, the tiniest things could upset my equilibrium and once I started to cry I just couldn't stop. And the more people were sympathetic and tried to comfort me the worse it would get. You know you're overreacting but you just can't do anything and sympathy adds to the emotional overload you are already dealing with.

These are the stories Heather that make me wish we were all just down the hall or down the road from each other and not oceans apart like so many of us. Naturally, I Suppose no one gets this like we all do. That is great to hear about your employer. If you can have that the next 9 years that would be great and make a big difference for you I know. This open discussion about our emotions has been so very good for me. I am comfortable enough in my manhood to admit to some weeping. Why not? Because men aren't suppose to cry? Bull! I'm a human being with feelings and have never seen any need to hide any emotion except maybe anger at. the appropriate times. 

4 hours ago, SassyBetsy said:

Grief is natural after a stroke. It is the biggest loss ever...no matter what degree of change or damage....add the fact that the brain is supercharged for pain or emotional control and face it what is more irritation and frustration than dealing with the medical community...from Dr offices to insurance. I remember my first appointment after hospital. My kids looked in shocked disbelief as I sobbed at the front desk because I was there at wrong time. I mean I sobbed like my cat ran away. Totally disproportionate. I Never cried in public!! AND FOR THAT? I would have gone for lunch. I would have b e been flexible and reason able. I felt my mind and soul were foreign as my body.

 

I took something for depression that also worked on nerve pain. It didn't work for me. I felt weirder and still hurt physically. It was trial by fire to be sure. I agree time helped  but on occasion when I am ill or tired. Was it menopausal?? All emotions were heightened. Honestly I still am raw sometimes.++

 

I say hey just deal with me. This is me. If they are not compassionate then I say it is on them. ?

Yep I felt raw all of a sudden a little bit ago. I'm over it.

Heather it can't be easy for you needing to be professional 5 days a week still along with all the other battles we face. Kudos to you!. Is there a light at the. end of the tunnel with work?

3 hours ago, Deigh said:

 

Under control? yes, but only just, and I have to take great care to avoid situations when it is under pressure. I must admit that this has become easier with time.

Deigh

Yes Deigh with time here too but it will never be easy of course. The meanness I seem to recognize when it starts to creep in and have been able now to nip that in the bud. The weeping part is a real struggle at certain times but I'm getting a bit. better. at doing that privately. Using that phrase "I've got this" isn't the total truth. More like a vote of confidence and push for me. 

1 hour ago, heathber said:

Go for it Will, I know Deigh has pretty much got it under control without using meds. I chose the meds path knowing that it would be long term and not super happy about it. But I needed a quick fix at the time. My plan is to wean off them once I retire and don't have to appear professional 5 days a week.  I've had a foretaste of what it will be like as I was put on another med at one point that interfered with the absorption of the lexapro and it was not fun, until I worked out what was happening and was able to readjust schedules/doses.

 

What I find helpful is knowing that the problem is in the executive control function which is a learned process that most of us master as toddlers. So this is no different to learning to walk and run again. So expect to fall occasionally and be prepared to pick yourself up and start again until the skill is reestablished.

Your information is priceless! Thank you for that. It sure makes sense to me.

 I know my friends there are a few different pills out there to treat these breakdowns. When I was given something for the 1st 6 months after my stroke in 2015 it honestly served it's purpose but I couldn't wait to stop taking it. I think it was for depression but forget it's name. Heathber  you said it so well. It's weeping and not full out crying. I reeled in the meanness issue on my own. April assured me I haven't been like that in a long time now. My project now is reeling in that weeping and I'm getting better everyday at it. I really don't want to take anymore pharmaceuticals because of all the side effects it has on me known and unknown. If I stay on schedule with my natural medicine it becomes much easier. I feel I got this! 

2 hours ago, Benni said:

I tell him "thank you" every time he does anything for me. Don't want him to feel taken for granted. 🙂

Same here, everything she does for me and I'm also working hard on controlling my emotional melt downs. I've got the meanness under control. That one surprised me because it was so not me. The sadness that sneaks up on me is next. That feeling sorry for myself crap. What compounds that for me is her seeing it. She doesn't need that and does fully understand it has nothing to do with her. That  always makes me feel worse. The good thing is I'm usually over it in 15 minutes or so. I came up with something we are going to start trying. When I am having "a moment" as she. calls them I am going to hold up my index finger to let her know it best to not be around me for a few minutes.

13 hours ago, Benni said:

Eating is very difficult. I can only stand to have a 1/2 teaspoonful in my mouth at a time -- takes forever to eat! I. also, drink supplements.

As if you don't already have enough to deal with. Please tell your husband thanks for what he does for you from someone who understands how much that means to us and how important it is to us. Couldn't make it without April!

7 minutes ago, Willis said:

Osceola was on my radar last winter and spring when we were house shopping. I looked around the area east, south and north (into Michigan) of South Bend too. As it worked out April and my daughter started walking neighborhoods near her house. They found one 7-8 minutes away from her by car. I was ready to "settle" just to get over here and close to her family and more into our lives. My wife in particular needed this. Sadly because the 42 year old owner passed suddenly last Feb. and it became available. I feel we really scored with the set up of the house, 3 bedrms and 2 baths main floor and the land. We left over two and a half acres behind. This has a small front lawn and the property behind the home is a ravine. Phew 

  I am not sure about nerve pain relief but it might be worth seeing if there has been any success. The biggest issue would be delivery. Sorry Benni this must make trying to eat and drink a challenge for you. So sorry, like you don't have enough challenges everyday already. Do your best to stay strong physically and mentally.

On 11/9/2021 at 11:13 AM, Benni said:

My daughter lives in Osceola, so I know South Bend.

Docs are still trying to find out. I don't actually have blisters, just the pain of them. Doc chalked it up to nerve pain, but is still hoping to get a certain diagnosis. He thinks it's more than nerve pain.

Osceola was on my radar last winter and spring when we were house shopping. I looked around the area east, south and north (into Michigan) of South Bend too. As it worked out April and my daughter started walking neighborhoods near her house. They found one 7-8 minutes away from her by car. I was ready to "settle" just to get over here and close to her family and more into our lives. My wife in particular needed this. Sadly because the 42 year old owner passed suddenly last Feb. and it became available. I feel we really scored with the set up of the house, 3 bedrms and 2 baths main floor and the land. We left over two and a half acres behind. This has a small front lawn and the property behind the home is a ravine. Phew 

4 hours ago, Benni said:

Newfoundland is very beautiful indeed! Hubs, and friends, are great supporters for sure.

I just read your profile. I grew up in Indiana -- Fort Wayne.

At 71 I still think there is a slim chance I may see it still some day. BTW I did notice we were born the same year. We moved to Granger by South Bend and are so glad. My wife is now only minutes from my daughter and I get to see my Grandsons a lot. We lived in Michigan and were 4 hours away. Different subject out of my curiosity.  Do they have any idea what is causing these blisters? 

6 minutes ago, Benni said:

I never gave it a second thought when I read your reply. 😁

Good! I read your profile. I don't remember doing that. I will have to check. You are from what I always thought was probably. one of. the prettiest places in North America. It looks like you have (like myself fortunately) good support. Where would we be without them? I can't imagine.

7 hours ago, Benni said:

I have tried edibles, so far they do nothing for me. Plus with my mouth pain (why i'm on gabapentin) they are too hard to chew.

Sorry I didn't think about your sores. I can be so insensitive sometimes but never intentional. I apologize.

5 hours ago, Benni said:

Willis, I had to start taking CBD oil to help me sleep. It works great! 

 Good Benni! I know it's not always medicinal depending on the problem but it does seem to always be good for sleeping for everyone. Keep exploring for yourself with edibles if you are comfortable with it. Just remember the. 1st commandment of edible sampling is "Slow (give it time) and LOW (small doses)" until you understand what you are doing. I'm here to help everyone I can if you or they have questions.

 All these pharmaceuticals with their side effects. Yuk! I have to take 2. One for seizures and one for BP. Hate them both, especially the seizure crap but I'm adjusting and i feel are needed. CBD is in total control of my pain management and the side effect is hours of deep sleep through the night. Even when I wake in the middle of the night after a few hours of deep sleep I can usually fall right back to sleep in say a half hour. It's been my life changer.  😴

Common stuff my friend. Just change the names to Wil and April. I try to keep all she puts up with and does for me in the front of my mind and still act like and respond like an  *beep* at times. It's a very good thing for me her father was a hardened city policeman she was raised by! We are still together with these women after all this and this would be so different without them we both know so well.

We love you friend and fellow stroker!

On 6/21/2021 at 4:08 AM, GreenQueen said:

Ok...so what does Mel Gibsoned mean?

 

I know it's not going to be flattering!

 

He is the original Mad Max. Which is set in 2021!!

 

He was also in one of Australia's best movies: Gallipoli. 

 

Both 80s movies. Maybe late 70s for Mad Max.

 

Very curious!

 

💚👑

Don't have any idea about what that might mean but great movie! Did not know it took place now. Well they were kinda close. lol

On 6/28/2021 at 7:39 AM, GreenQueen said:

Willis soooo many things I would love to claim as my own!

 

I always thought that I had thought up:

 

Don't expect anything then you'll never be disappointed. 

 

Found out recently that I wasn't the first to coin that phrase!

 

💚👑

😍

59 minutes ago, heathber said:

Nicely put Will.

 

Thank you friend. Wish I could claim it as mine but I copied a post of this to my photos to keep and share. he-he. I do however love all those clever, witty, "wish I'd said that" things!

On 6/20/2021 at 7:44 AM, will2 said:

Hi Janelle, yea the "hippies" were my generation. We would spend many an hour in those Head Shops back in the 70's. Buying the clothes, the John Lennon round frame glasses, living the part. I did my share of partaking of the evil weedIn fact, out of just about all my friends I grew up with in High School got high. Maybe one or two odd ones didn't. We were the Coconut Grove crowd and made our way from concerts in the parks to Stadiums. I eventually grew away from it in my College days and then my employer of 25yrs did random drug screening. In fact because our dept had Nuclear Plant access, we were on two random drug testing. I can tell you though, so far I've only used the oral routes of administration and it's nothing like what I remember smoking back in the 70's recreationally. Best I can describe is that it seems more controlled, or targeted for specific purposes, like pain and/or anxiety and sleep. No realized "buzz", no outrageous laughing, no munchies, etc.

 

Now with that said, I've yet to try any of the smokable route, from what I understand the full flower effects technically called the "entourage effects" I haven't tried. And those brownies, cookies and candy edibles I prefer not to indulge in, I'd be eating way too much to keep my girlish figuret does however without a doubt help to get a faster more relaxed sleep though, thats a fact!

Hippie or dippy or what ever our moniker 😁 we are side effect free, well rested and have our pain and discomfort under control nicely. Cannabis a medicine so awesome that most people take it for the side effects

.