jriva

KJ,

I tell this so often on the board that regulars are probably sick of hearing it, but they told us that my husband would be "nothing but a vegetable for the rest of his life." They were so wrong!!!!! Don't believe that stuff the medical community is telling you. You just have to keep working and believing that improvement is possible and you have to keep your husband believing that his patience and hardwork will pay off. Because it will! I can see why an OT would say a person might not improve fast enough to keep their insurance in place but they are WRONG to tell you there will be no improvement or "this isn't going to work." We did a ton of homemade therapies and made enough gains on our own to get my husband into a rehab from a nursing home situation.

You will raise your voices again....it's very frustrating. So don't be so hard on yourself for being human. But work on finding the humor in stuff---it helped us a lot.

Jean

Pam,

You are lucky to have the wildlife to watch so close to an apartment. The doesn't happen in the bigger cities. I'd love watching your critters. Chipmonks and deer are favorites of mind.

Jean

Hi,

I just wanted to welcome you to the blog community! It's a good place to vent and work on our emotions, as I'm sure you'll find out soon.

Jean

Pam,

You've got a right to be proud of yourself! That awakening you had walking through the house you shared with Kurt was wonderful: A house is not a home. You're making great progress! Give it a month or so and your apartment will feel like a real home to you.

Jean

Hi Annie,

I've been pushing a wheelchair around for five years now and one thing you will learn is that in big crowds like that it's easier to come early, so you can be one of the first into the auditorum and then to wait until the room is nearly cleared out before attempting to leave....unless they have an usher who invites you to cut in front and will help you do that. That's been my experience, anyway, cut down on the stress of those hot, uphill holding patterns as much as you can.

Jean

They do, Marty. It's call high-priced condo living where they have associations that make rules like what color your mailbox can be and how many minutes you can leave your garage door open when you exit and enter your house. I like the concept of putting all the control freaks together in one place.

Jean

Jean

Vicki,

Get yourself on of those shopping carts that people take to flea markets and farmers markets. That will steady you without looking "handicapped." I have one that I actually use to carry the stuff we buy at places like that because I can't carry it all. If you haven't seen one, they are the height and shape of a gulf bag on wheels only they are made of light weight nylon. They also make one out of wire that two grocery bags fit perfect in, side by side.

Jean

Cindy,

You look just like you write....like someone I'd like to know in real life.

Don't hold your breath waiting for my photo to get posted. I can't find anyone who still develops those glass slides in my camera.

Jean

Marty,

Since you are selling the house, you sure can have a lot of fun with your exit plans. Just don't tell your realtor about the neighbor for hell, they can't keep their mouths shout.

Jean

P.S. By the way, we might be in one of those southwest Michigan resort towns tomorrow, too!!!!

P.S. Again. The counters on these blogs aren't always working right. You can test it by bouncing in and out a few times and nothing changes. Eventually, they seem to catch up and all of a sudden you'll see a big jump. Just thought, you as a blog virgin, would like to know this.

Phyllis,

What is "field merchandising" that allows you to live in Florida and work for a company in Minnesota?

Jean

Hey, I want into this boo-boo kiss in! I might have to fake fall to get a few but that can be arranged.

Jean

Hi Butch,

What Michael is saying about finding out more about why they need what they are asking for is probably in your own best interest. Then you can decide easier if you want to put her through more tests and being away from home. If it's purely for their benefit or the benefit of future stroke patients, let them get copies of your wife's records from our local doctor, if that is your choice. Maybe there is something that really does needs to be tracked every so often that isn't being covered locally.

I've seen a lot of different caregiver approaches on this site: 1) Some spouses are so desperate to get their loved one back the way they were that they drag them to doctor after doctor hoping to find an undiscovered miracle cure. And 2) Those of us, like you, who don't want to see our spouses go through anymore pain or to be used as a guinea pig. Sometimes the line between these two camps is not all that clear cut because while we don't want our loved ones used, we also want to give them the best chance to get a quality of life back again.

You will get through this, Butch. You can't control or fix it, but you'll learn to accept that your best is good enough.

Jean

Marty,

You forgot: posterior, fanny and rump. If you're going to fall alot you need a lot of euphemisms to describe those times. Have you thought of getting wearing football protective gear?

Jean

And I second that. Glad you'll still alive and kicking Janice.

Jean

Marty,

I love James Patterson's books, too. Nothing like a good murder or two to solve to keep you awake at night. I love his writing style a lot.

And I'll bet you'll also get hooked on blogging. We come here when we just want to communicate but what we have to say is either politically incorrect for the message board or it just doesn't fit in anywhere or we are just rambling because that's what bloggers all seem to do. It's fun and addictive.

Jean

Clark,

I know there is nothing I can say that will help, so I won't try to "cheer you up."

But I just wanted you to know that I read all your blogs and I care about you. I will keep you in my thoughts.

Jean

That's really a wonderful story. Thanks for sharing it!

Jean

Dollar stores are fun when you're broke but you want that high of spending money. I've never been in one that I didn't find at least one thing that I didn't know I wanted until I saw it. When I was a kid we called them dollar stores.

Jean

Ladies,

It seems to me that gravity is responsible for a lot of our problems in the looks department. So, the simple solution to that is to stand on our heads naken in front of that full-lenght mirror. Upside down, we're all bound to look better

Jean

Vicki: Wisconsin has some beautiful, secluded resorts. Now I feel bad that I didn't bid on that one! Take a look at what could have been your vacation view for under $20.00. http://www.almawisconsin.com/

Pam: Auctions are all about lossing your impulse control. If you don't do that at least once per auction, you're not having fun.

Jean

Vicki,

Don and I love those PPS auctions, too. We've both bought and donated to them. What is the Sesame Street you bought, a game? I want details of your latest purchase.

Jean

Welcome to our blog community, Phyllis, the best kept secret of Strokenet. You'll like it here. We have do some venting, have some fun and generally learn a more about each other's lives.

Jean

Butch,

Is it like you can't allow yourself to happy because you're sort of mentally staying prepared for something that to go wrong, if you don't keep up your guard? I think that happens a lot.

Jean

Butch,

As caregivers, I think we all tend to forget that our depression caused by the changes in our lives catches up with us in the most unexpected ways. Like Michael says, don't beat yourself up over the valleys that are a natural part of the process. If you start getting too many valleys and not enought peaks, don't be so proud or "male" that you don't want to ask your doctor for a little temporary chemical help.

Jean

Pam,

Have you called Greyhound about their stops and schedules? Some of them have weekly stops at tiny towns where you can catch a ride to a bigger city for a day of shopping, etc.

Kim, might be on to something. Maybe you could start a club of some kind. Maybe a call it desparate housewives aka women looking for fun.

Jean