Phyllis4732

I have said that having a stroke is fate. I have said that where a person gets a stroke is fate. I understand that bad things happen to good people. I consider myself to be a good person but today I have to wonder why I was made a survivor. I have said that being a survivor is not free and that it is pay-back time. This pay back is in the form of helping "newbies" That said, I need help with the awful turn of events that have happened today. We know that the lightning rod symbol is the universal symbol of stroke because it happens so quickly- just like an auto accident. Today, while driving to work on a 2 lane rural road in the dark and raining quite heavily, I had an awful accident. The trooper who investigated was the same man who I had had a previos issue with. Wonder what the odds are of that? I was driving close to the center line because it was a gold reflective type (had reflectors) and the side line was a dirty white with no reflectors which then becomes a ditch not too far off the road. He said that when 2 objects hit a mark is made and that it showed my tire was over the line. The driver of the oncoming car hit me on the side and then I believe he hit the car behind me and then the next car apparently spun around because perhaps he braked and hit another car. The person who hit me took off - was a hit and run. My car crossed the road and headed for the drainage ditch and stopped just short of going in the water of the ditch- it seemed quite deep. I didn't know where I was or that allt this had happened and could see that I was "in the woods". Both air bags deployed. I was not injured (however somehow my pinkie toe on my left foot (the good one) felt like a brise or something. I son't know how that happened. When asked, I was told that one of the people got a bump on the head (and I thought- oh no) An ambulance came but I don't believe he was taken to a hospital. I was asked if I wanted to go to the hospital since I was obviously shaken up - very cold, shaking from that at times, wet etc. and very alone. Since my car traveled, I was quite a distance from the others. 4 cars were involved and 3 were towed. So, while I was not the hitter, IF I was over the line at all, I am responsible. I really do not think I was-- close to it but not about 6-8" as the trooper indicated, Of course that doesn't matter how much. The fact that the man took off doesn't help or hinder. I know we are not to ask why? but I am. I was doing nothing wrong such as drinking or on drugs. In fact, I do not drive fior several hours after taking my meds and usually take the pill with me and take it after I arrive. I am on the patch but do not take any tranquilizers, anti depressants etc. The sad part was yesterday when I arrived for work, I was sent home because there were not enough people and I am a 3rd party worker (I don't really understand this) I asked if I should stay home tomorrow and was told, he would not know until today when people came or did not. When I called to say why I wasn't there, I found that I would have been sent home. Fate? Or just plain lousy luck? Can anyone explain this. I need a job, but this wasn't what I wanted and in fact my division had been changed to a new division when I could work at the time I wanted not at a time when the team works. Strange indeed.

Good news, Sue. BTW, new picture of you? Looks very lifelike, Almost as if you are really there. What Asha said is sort of what my sister did when her husband was ill. She would write a generic email of his condition and then if she wanted to add an additional sentence, did. Hope things continue improving. It's back to baby steps but not as bad as if it were another stroke, so, it has a few wee good points.

LOL! Don't let Al Gore see your title. Thanks for the recipe. I'm not a clam person but I do like some of the other things to make it. Using a bay leaf is great. I love them and must get a tree started. My sis has 7 trees and doesn't like them and NEVER uses them. She sure doesn't act like our mother's daughter. :uhm:

I guess you could say this is a "bedroom area". People live here and commute to Orlando. There is a super speedy road (which is always being repaired) and they speed to get to work. I have refused to work at places on the way and on other places take back roads and roads I know. People don't seem to care about anyone but themselves when they get behind a wheel. I can't wait until I live in the woods. I'll find all the back raods. My problem is seeing and reading signs when traveling in excess of 60 to keep fromthe speeders baging into me. It's the pits! :Tantrum:

Well, I saw the new Dr. today (actually not the one I was to see). The computers that were in each room must have been taken by the old doc to his new office in Georgia and in their place.................are you ready? a gallon jar of Kosher Dill Pickles! Same brand that is on the counter here. I have always been taught that when you have high blood pressure, you are to limit your intake of salty foods and pickles are a salty food. Because I am slightly heavy (the diagonsis is obesity (unspecified) ? huh? :uhm: Seems to be an obese person is more than an "Overweight one" and I am only the latter. Yes, I suppose I should be a size 8 and I am a 12. Obese? So ok, I was given a food sheet and it has the food triangle (ok I agree freah veggies and frutis are good) and a list of food to eliminate (yes, I love them all) and a list of allowed foods (Shrimp? - high cholesterol, Canadian bacon? ok better than regular, but and fruit juice is to be eliminated and get this- Dill pickles and sauerkraut (another salty) are called "Weight Loss Expeditors" Excuse me?????? So I questioned the good doc and he said, you then drink water and the salt is eliminated that way.........Anyone ever hear of anything so crazy? Sure, you'd be thin and get a stroke from all the salt! I didn't mention that I'm a graduate home economist and took many diatetic courses. Yes, it was a long time ago but some of these wacky diets have gone too far. Didn't Dr. Atkins die at an early age? The good thing though was that I went to get meds and not be hassled and I got the prescriptions. Unfortunately though, they are having with medicare, Humana. As far as I'm concerned I'd starve and get my meds in Canada if need be rather than go to an HMO. They may be great for the doctors (they are money makers) but if you get a stroke, I KNOW they will not pay for an acute rehab or a top notch atep-down in many cases. To each his own. The worst part was I had to wait for an hour for my appointment and had our book club book but wish I had ear plugs also; they constantly had Humana lectures going on a VCR, I was ready to throw a shoe at the TV. Great for stress............

Sue, please take some time now for you because before you know it, Ray will be home again, your chance will be gone - the time is now. I know it's easier to say and certainly, you should visit etc. but maybe a snack out or a movie with friends such as the woman you mentioned.

Definitely Jean, I've even seen some of my therapists in stores in town. When I went to see my ex-roommate, after my out-patient and went to the gym, I'd get huge hugs. It certainly is a feather in their cap when they see the fruits of their labor.

For 2 weeks now I have been complaining about having to get up at 4 am and go to work, Well, the last day came. No more loud, continuing alarm clock which I put far away so I can't turn it off and go back to sleep. When the reset supervisor asked me how I was, I say good; this is the last day. (I didn't mention that I had changed divisions and would be doing different kind of work) and he said, well not next week but the week after, we have you again. News to me, and not sure this is definite. I always say, "Never again" but I do have to admit that the check coming is nice. Guess I have to hope that fate will settle this and the new job kicks in...........or here we go again. :uhm:

Sorry about the crummy day. They do happen. The wisest thing was to just stay quietly at the business.. There are times when I just want to spend time alone - or with the dog. , Definitely could have been all the hubub from the holidays building up and then the quiet of January. As Fred had written to someone several days ago - January is half over. It wasn't then (and I wondered why he said it) and isn't now. but thank goodness, it is going fast. The quiet is good but the let-down isn't., thoughit it gives us the chance to unwind and set our course again. Perhaps we should declare January 15 as a day to unwind every year, If enough of us do, Hallmark willl soon be printing cards for it. LOL!

I am in a state of shock! Recently, I received a form letter from my Dr. stating that along with Medicare, he was going to be a Humana Dr, He expounded on the wonders of belonging to such a group, I had no intention of joining, I have a personal dislike of HMO's but to each his own, Today I called up to make an apppointment because I'm almost out of medicine and the reseptionist said he isn't here anymore. I guess I said What? and she said that he sold his practice and is moving. I asked where and she said to Georgia. I have followed hom in the past 14-1/2 years from Ormond Beach to Jacksonville Beacg and Jacksonville to Ponte Vedre (between Jacksonville and St Augustine) to Lake City and then to two locations in St. Augustine where he had his own practice. He said his wife # (#2) said that that was it, she wasn't moving anymore. He bought a home, had a son (had a daughter with the first wife who he has custody of) and everything seemed ok and now this!. I have come to the conclusion that this man m has a flaw somewhere. He is no longer a kid, He seemed to have a good practice but then he started messing it up and people (one I know) stopped going to him. He was debiting checks before the ink was even dry. Guess he just got an offer to good to refuse. Maybe he wants to try the medical drug sales racket as he had said many friends were doing. If he wants to practice in another state, he would have to get a license but why? He loves golf and bosting and he had it all,,,,,,,,unless there is now wife #3. Guess I'll never know............ So, what do you do when you need medication and don't have time to find someone else? I have many crazy ideas but not taking meds (although I'd like to) is not one of them. So, I took an appointment with an ex-retired, plder Dr. and maybe he has old fashiuoned iseas like I have. I hope so. :uhm:

Gary, it was so nice to see your visit. I do want to thank all the Canadians here for the beautiful weather. Make a deal.............you can have some of Florida's warm air pumped up to you IF you promise to mix it with your cold and not send any of the cold here. Deal? Visited Harmony Lane a few times but you were not home. Yes, I did help myself to a Pepsi; thank you very much. Guess Ibetter hustle on. I have to finish Danielle Steels latest so I can start the book from the book club here that I picked up from the library and then get some sleep. I get ti sleep a whole hour more and my drive time will also be cut in half,

I accepted the offer to be a part of the reset team for two weeks. I'll never learn. I recently made arrangements to transfer to a different, physically easier division. The money may not be as great but it will not be necessary to get up at 4 am, I am not a morning person and the clanging of the alarm when it's still dark is not my thing. Because I am a very heavy sleeper, I have to put clock where I can't reach it to turn it off and go back to sleep. This is hard because I should not quickly jump out of bed because of the meds I take.I then sit quietly for 1/2 to 3/4 hour and then after taking the dog out, leave and drive 1-1/2 hours and be at the store to start at 7am. Not only is it still dark but the fog at that time has been awful. I was given a section of the cereal aisle to reset. I'm 5'2" and the top shelp is too high for me. We use plastic milk crates to stand on, however I realized that instead of using a piece of wood to knock those in the back of the top shelf down, it would be easier if I was closer - which meant going higher. So, I "made" steps, a single and then a double. The sad part was that it is easier to have the double boxes on the right but because it is my affected leg side, I had to work in reverse. The laugh for me came when the reset supervisor came by and told me to be careful because he didn't want to do CPR. Little does he know........I had to be sure not to laugh out loud!. Guess he thinks I just walk funny because I have arthritis. LOL! Next week another week of "fun" but closer, less driving and I get to sleep an hour longer.

OK. now you've joined the crew. LOL. Bull dogs are beautiful with their pushed in noses. I had a shop near a vet and this couple had 2 or maybe 3 white ones; they were great looking. OK, you're already too late for the first piece of advice but for others. When you want a certain breed, go to a show dog bredder of that breed. No, my brain hasn't loss all of it's marbles. A man from AKC I guess who I had contacted to get a chi after my breeder was "put away" told me this, when I said I didn't want a show dog - He said, "we don't always get show dogs - you will get a well bred dog who many has something that would keep it from being a show dog (such as weighing a few ounces too much) but only a judge could tell and you will be getting a well bred dog". And you know what, they don't charge as much as you'd expect because they have no use for a dog who won't be a show dog and are glad for them to get a home. BUT - you did do the right thing in going to a breeder not a pet shop. Also, when they suggest a friend that is good. I had a local woman bring 2 dogs with her that her friend who was also a breeder and also went on the show circuit sent for me to see and choose - so it was a good thing you did that. 8-10 weeks is the age that's best for a puppy to be weaned from it's mother. OK, training- remember a puppy is a baby and like children, they are incapable to control their bladders until they are around 6 months or so. Whoever walks the dog should say, good boy. If you choose you may give the dog a goodie also at this time but I never did- I'd be broke. BTW, I'm a dog person for more years than many - I've belonged to chi groups also and have chi friends all over. You'll find that a stroke support group will have to move over a bit because you'll want to "meet" other bull dog owners. LOL And yes, Asha, it is the #1 source of unconditional love. You've already started showing pictures like a new parent and that dog isn't even yours! Oh, and of course congratulations - there's nothing like it next to human kids- and they don't ever talk back. LOL.

I call "hanging around "payback time". The price you pay for being a survivor. But...........in the end, it's what works for you.

Since I believe in the saying - "People plan and God laughs", I don't have to worry about resolutions. LOL!

Sue, I was going to ask how the New Year is since you are already there; but I see, it's basically "the same old, same old".Guess that should be understandable. I just guess I'm looking for earth-shattering news which is not possible for anyone. You do seemm to have sorted your future somewhat by at least thinking about it and that certainly is the right start. A very Happy and Healthy 2007 to you, Ray and your family

It was sad that the hostesses apparently are brain dead. People don't use canes to be fashionable; shouldn't that have told them something? I imagine sensitivity classes aren't as important as learning to place a menu in front of people - then again, %wise, I'd say a good many people are insensitive- often until they find themselves in the same place, As for the teen-agers, one bad apple wasn't a bad %. True o% would have been better. It was nice though that the others reacted as they did. I hope in the end you got to enjoy your meal.

Robyn, so glad you sent a blog. I've been thinking about you but decided that perhaps you decided to move on without us; I'm glad you didn't. I'm so glad things are looking up for you, and especially happy that Margaret feels as she does about your new "friend". I think that this is the perfect week for all of us to "think about the past year and look ahead to the future" as you have done. Hope to see you around here, and remember, if you get to see your parents, get in touch with me. Phyllis

I agree with Jean. Haven't they heard that laughing is good for you. As for tracking mud, you got caught - it went right to your room. LOL! Sorry, just my stupid sense of humor.

Well, what do you know; I'e found the 2nd Helen! Way back in the late 30's or 40's my mother played bridge with a woman named Helen. The game was at our house and when Helen didn't arrived, my mother worried and called her. She was home. As she was coming down the stairs (and I believe she even had her coat on), she saw the wall had a smudge and well, you know the rest............when she cleaned the smudge off, the rest of the wall seemed dirty! Just like you. LOL! Unfortunately, I will know what you mean. I've been packing for a move. I don't know half of the things that were put in boxes and made the trip here; I was in rehab and my family did it. I will have a little extra space but being a collector of things............oh, be thankful you aren't me, because. you already have some of it done. Phyllis

Like Asha, I'd like some cookies too - or at least the recipe. Wonder if it is a cookie I remember from my childhood but don't have a recipe for ?????

Why is life so cruel? About a year ago, give or take a fe months, I met a couple in dtroke support. They are a nice couple; the wife is the survivor and the husband is the caregiver. Recently, she has started to again shoe progress and was able to again start therapy. We had gone to dinner once and it was a nice outing and then do to work, I missed the last meeting. I emailed them and said we should get together and asked what happened at the meeting. When I hadn't heard, I called but got the answering machine and left an answer, Today, I received a call from the survivor. She told me that her husband had had brain surgery for a brain tumor and it was found to be malignant. How can these things happen? Yes, I read the book, Bad things Happenm to Good People but that doesn't make things anty better. It has been about 10 days since the surgery and he is in a rehab; I went to see him and he looked quite well. Tomorrow he is going to do the pre-arrangements for radiation and will most likely have chemo as well. In a strange way, her now having to be the caregiver in a sense perhaps is a blessing of sorts because it may (in a strange way) set a course for her to advance and for him - well, a certain number of people do become survivors and why can't he be one of them. I pray that this will happen. There is a saying that translated is,"People plan and God laughs" If you think about it , it's so true.

One of the nice things about living in central Florida is when a space shuttle takes off. I've gone on the beach for the daytime take-off but last night was the first nighttime take-off in over four years. We're about 100 miles away but get a good view because we are 2-1/2 blocks from the coasr so basically it is an unobstructed view. I waited to just before the time set because it was cold and all of a sudden I saw the area light-up to "daylight" I got a little nervous that perhaps there was an explosion, but shortly after it appeared and what a beautiful sight it was. I watched until it was no longer visible and then came in and again watched on tv. It's still hard for me to believe that this happens. I'm sure my parents would have said I was losing it if I told them that men were going to a space station that is just kind of "running around the whole". I realized that many have not ever seen even a dot of a space ship but believe me, there truly is such a thing.

This turned into a terrible week for me! After starting out so well from the Christmas Party, it went down hill. I imagine life is like that- ups and downs but the part that has had the worst effect is the loss of the husband of a woman who belonged to a cluib with me. I didn't actually know the man except for seeing him at affaits - usually during the holiday season. I don't know why, but when speaking to my sister about him, I'd always refer to him as Donald Trump. I haven't the slightest idea why. Perhaps because they were well off (though not anywhere as as weathy as "The D") or maybe it was the way he combed his hair. It was reddish and at Christmas he wore a bright kelly green jacket. The woman was always very nice to me; Me with my crazy balance. She nearly had a fit when we were leaving a party that she had at her home and I was on her driveway saying goodbye and I did my famous- oops my balance "act". It was only a few months after I had had my stroke and shortly after I was walking unaided. Later she told me about some oxygen product from a health food store that she felt would help my brain to heal better and even offered it buy it for me. It was a year ago when I last saw here and had told her that I really didn't need it because my neurologist had some sort of gadget that measures oxygen in the blood (which I couldn't understand and mine was 99 which was the best you could get, they said. She still felt it would help me. It was just a few weeks after when I heard that her husband had had a stroke. As I'm sure we all feel, I felt so helpless and wondered how I could help, then again, when you are improved and you are trying to help one who is newly shocked by stroke to a loved one, you are in a strange position (JMHO) Well, I imagine he went to the hospital that I was at originally was at and the nicest thing they did for me was to transfer me to another hospital because they didn't have a neurosurgeon. They since have gotten one but I do believe they are not as good as where I went. They have been advertising that they are a stroke center etc. and the competition advertises that they are Central Florida's ONLY Comprehensice Stroke Center. Of course both hospitals loose patients but the first place is really known as a heart surgery place. Anyway, it was a year since the man's stroke. She had told my sister that he would not do therapy and as I have found with others, this is the worse thing one can do. I hope we all know this. I feel bad that I somehow didn't find a way to let them know..........but then again telling people one thing and getting them to do it is a different story. I will miss seeing my Donald Trump and sympathise with his wife.

Sue, what a truly lovely blog you wrote and how wonderful that Ray has this wonderful attitude and does things to help others less fortunate. Maybe some of those who see this will become ashamed of themselves and do some too. I think what he does is wonderful and give him a big hug and kiss from me - well, you can pretend it's from you (an extra) but we'll know that that one is really from me. LOL