HostAsha

Terry : sometimes people say dumbest things not because they want to be mean, its just that they are ignorant and uncomfortable and don't know how to say comforting things. you need to just forgive & forget those stupid comments. Asha

Sally : congratulations, more you use your hand better it will become & your new normal will be easier. all this small stepping stones will build great new life, and soon you will realize like rest of us life post stroke also is great, its just little different on how you accomplish things around house. Asha

Ruth : she is so adorable no wonder you both love her so much Asha

Sally : great accomplishments, keep on building on this small building blocks & soon you will find & enjoy your new normal. Asha

:congrats: katrina, this promotions should calm all chatter that goes in your brain about how you are less than some one or not good enough because you are disabled. I hope & pray you remember this day for long time & silence those bad thoughts with this great news. So proud of you. I tell about you to my son all the time. you are quite an inspiration. love Asha

Fred : Enjoy your vacation with your family. we will hold the fort till you get back with all the dough good luck. Asha

Fred: I am sorry for your loss. you and your family will be in my thoughts and prayers. Asha

Jean : welcome to best online stroke support community. you write so beautifully. Stroke affects whole family. As a survivor I can so identify with what you are going through right now. I know stroke affects whole family. as a family we walked same path you are walking right now in 2004. But I am here to tell you even though it feels like you are drowning sometimes in sea of self-pity & uncertainty. just remember to keep your head above water & I promise you tide will change. when my stroke left me paralyzed on my left side in 2004 & retired me from the job I loved I never thought I would find joy in living again, I hanged tight dearly on my hubby's strength till I found this site & found my own inner strength again. Now after 9+ years on this post stroke journey I can look back & see my stroke just as speed bump in my life's journey which allowed me to slow down & enjoy scenery along the way. though I admit it was not easy first few years, had it not been my young son & hubby I would not be here. Though I found blogging & chatting with other survivors very therapeutic for my soul. hope to see you around more often. Encourage David to join our survivors chats, or start his own blog. Asha (now 42 year old survivor)

Nancy : I am so happy for all of you. Enjoy your trip Asha

Debbie : I know the feeling. If I try to look too far ahead or have expectations of my efforts, I always face disappointments. So learnt hard way that just do my karma according to my dharma & don't be attached to any results, then I am able to enjoy my life to fullest. so for me I just flow with my life flow & do my duties which is whatever required of me as mother, wife or for myself on that day. then there is no stress since I know I did my best for that day rest is in god's hands & whatever will be will be is my motto & I believe god is taking care of me since I am doing my job with right intentions behind it. Asha

Kelly : no one is perfect & l feel every one shows & feel love different way. I hope you hve read 5 love language book to realize your hubby loves you & shows his love different way than what you feel. I know I feel same way about my husband I feel loved by words of affirnation & he shows his love through his act of service. For me it took stroke to realize he loves me & that's why je is still around in my life. I feel its same way about your husband. just because he does not show his love by physical touch does not mean he does not love you, otherwise it was easy to walk away from relationship, but he is still here. I feel lot of time we waste valuable time in trying to change other person instead of just changing ourselves. hope you see his love, being good father is important part of relationship too. Asha

I saw oprah's commencement speech of 2013 to harvard & loved it. I totally agree with her words of wisdom about what one considers failure in life, änd I quote her "There is no such thing as failure. Failure is just life trying to move us in another direction. Now, when you’re down there in the hole, it looks like failure. … Give yourself time to mourn what you think you may have lost, but then here’s the key: Learn from every mistake because every experience, encounter and particularly your mistakes are there to teach you and force you into being more who you are. And then figure out what is the next right move. And the key to life is to develop an internal moral, emotional GPS that can tell you which way to go". I know this is true for my life, after my stroke I felt like failure & did not think I have any purpose of being alive, but I am thankful that after mourning my losses I found new meaningful direction to my life, so her line talks very personally to me. I enjoy watching commencement speeches. they are always very inspiring & funny. thought would share my new interest. Asha

Jhari : I am sending you lot of virtual hugs. loosing loved one is hard & I pray you get strength to get through this difficult phase in your life. grief does not follow those 4 steps defined in the book, it has its own way of finding acceptance. so be kind to yourself while you go through those difficult stages of your life. Asha

Katrina : I am so happy for you, your realization about faith is similar to what I read in when bad things happen to good people book by harold kushner. that book changed my way of looking at bad things in our life. Also if you get chance watch oprah's 2013 commencement speech to harvard on youtube. where she beautifully says & I paraphrase it that failure in life is telling you that its just change in direction of your life's journey. Asha

Glenn : welcome to best online stroke support group. Aging with stroke is no picnic, hope & pray tomorrow is better day for you. hope you get your physical & get doctors feedback on how to improve your health. Asha

Sue : you are one fortunate mom to have such a great kids. life feels so great when surrounded by so much love & support. Asha

Debbie : its so nice that you guys got to meet each other & spend time together & have fun together. I am J. Its nice to meet each other & build new friendship. Asha

Lenny : this is such a great blog, you are my kind of guy. I love your positive attitude towards life. life is what you make of it with or without stroke. your family is lucky to have you in their life. love Asha

Sue : I am sending you all my hugs, but remember you were one of the best caregiver I have ever known. & he is on his happy trail till you meet him again. hugs, Asha

I am reading this great book four agreement by some spiritual author, its great read. It talks about how following these simple 4 rules you can create heaven right here on earth & end almost all suffering. his first rule is be impeccable with your words. what you think & tell yourself creates lot of suffering. I know this for fact. his second rule is don't take anything personally. people will say things without meaning it & if you take it personally you make it your reality, and add to your suffering. third rule is assume nothing I guess I have mastered this rule since I am never afraid to ask questions till I understand fully. I know sometimes it drives kido mad at me. but I strongly feel when you assume you make ass out of u and me so better ask. and his last rule is always do your best, I guess if you don't assume & always do your best then there are no regrets whatever will be will be, atleast you know you have done your best Asha

Lenny : My prayers are with all the families who have gotton affected by this tornado in oklahoma. Asha

Sue : I understand your struggles, I went through similar what's the purpose of my life if I am not software Engineer or caregiver or mom when kido won't need me any more. you are here for a reason even though you don't feel useful or needed right now. purpose of our life is to be happy & bring joy to others. you will find your new normal soon, and you will realize the wisdom we get going through these painful days are priceless. you have touched & helped so many lives even being so far with your presence on this site. hugs, Asha

Katrina : I hope you get your answer soon to all your troubles. what I have found keeping my thoughts on positive track has reduced my anxiety. & that's law of attraction. positivity attracts positive things in life. read the secret book. Asha

Dyan : you will be in my prayers for getting solution & quick recovery for your breathing problem. you got nice relationship with cayden. enjoy every day kids griw up way too fast. Asha