HostAsha

lenny: you nailed it, no wonder you are doing so well in your recovery. you have great attitude towards your life & stroke recovery. I feel the same, that's why I am able to realize stroke is just bump in my life's journey it made me slow down & enjoy the sightseeing while on this journey. Asha

Sue: in India in our community adult kids living with parents is normal. It has its own benefits & pitfalls. Thing is like every other relationship you have to do adjustments & sometimes one gives in more than others but if all keep forgiving hearts you can enjoy benefits of living together. I know downsizing for you must be painful. I remember when hubby was getting rid of my prestroke clothes I no longer could wear, it depressed me whole day & I didn't help him 1 bit in his downsizing efforts. I felt as if he was throwing away my hope to wear those clothes again, but oh well you move on & adjust I bought load of new sets of clothes in which we are creating new memories in it. as we grow old things change in our life its not good or bad its just different, whether we choose happiness in it will be our choice. Asha

Debbie: you have kept Bruce busy & involved in his life that is commendable. No wonder he is doing so much better in his recovery. you both will be in my thoughts & prayers for happy holidays. Asha

Dyan: at our house we never keep toys away from kids till chirstmas, as soon as he gets his games or toys he can start enjoying it right away. he knows its his xmas gifts & he got it early so that he can enjoy it longer, there is no gurantee of the tomorrow so why not enjoy things you like today itself, thats what our philosophy is & it has worked fine at our household. Asha

Lydia: I think mediation mantra "God I give you all my worries, please take care of them" every day for 5 mins in the morning might do the trick. let go & let God takes care of things. Asha

hey Holly: I agree with Ruth completly, first year & first 6 months are hardest to deal with it for both survivor & caregiver. you will need to be strong for both of you right now, though as my hubby used to say to me when I felt like drowning. he would say just keep your head above water right now & things will change, & as a drwoning man would cling to leaf I clinged to strength of his words at that time, but now that we have been through that dark phase of our life I would tell you one thing which I know for sure just hang in there & take one day at a time right now, but it will get easier & better I can promise you that cause I have lived to tell it to you personally. don't get too overwhelmed by amount of work you still need to do, just do one thing at a time & when it gets accomplisshed, don't forget to give pat in a back for job well done. I love the idea of balloons too, maybe incorporate in our life too. Asha

Fred: hope you have great time at the party & please update us your party details so that I don't have to become fly at the wall of your bank & get whacked by someone lol Asha

holly: welcome to wonderful world of blogging. Belated happy Birthday to you. As a survivor I can understand how your mom must be feeling. Family's love & support gives hope & strength to survivors to fight & reclai,their life back. your mom & your family will be in my thoughts and prayers. though first few years are hardest to deal with all changes in your life. Asha

Orlando: I am glad you are havng good day today & wrote blog about it, I feel when you focus on positives in your life you are able to handle not so good days much better way. Asha

recently I was reading posts in forums & I see how differently every one copes with difficult situation in their life. Also in real world among my friends & family I see how every one deals with troubles or situation. After discussing with hubby about it I realized all coping skills are individual based and nothing is better than others people use whatever works for them. Some people like to blame others for their situation, or misfortune even survivors, I have seen this in my life & on this board. luckily my family is not one of them, I like to take responsibility for my actions. I believe in good and bad things happening to every one & none of us are exempt from pain in life, but that's where I draw the line, to make that pain into suffering is one's own choice in my mind. I feel if you don't like something then work towards how to resolve that problem then get stuck in poor me victim mentality. that's how I feel, and that's how I roll in my life. I am thankful that hubby Mr. Sunshine guy, he can find rainbow even in dreary situations, I know without him post stroke I would not have been able to cross darkest alley of my life Asha

Casen: I am sorry to hear about your new stroke, you will be in my thoughts & prayers for quick recovery. Asha

Lenny: isn't kids amazing seeing that joy in them makes you happier I bet. Asha

Fred: have fun at the party. when you go with that positive attitude you are going to have lot of fun. Asha

hey orlando: you got great attitude. Once you realize post stroke life is just different not necessarily bad or good just different & we are incharge of our thoughts and our happiness. I feel once you realize life becomes great one more time, start celebrating all small improvements, they all add up & it becomes our new normal. why I am saying this cause I have been through it & know it for sure. Asha

Katrina: I am so happy you are realizing in midst of scare, when you focus on positive things in our life. you attract more positivity in your life. Another trick I have learnt to increase my happiness when I talk about positive things in my life in a blog simple gesture of my son telling me, he loves me made me appreciate it even more cause lot of other times he is telling how I am such mean mom you are growing up into real wise woman kido. Asha

MC: this is best news I have heard in whole day. I know you have been waiting patiently for this day to arrive & slowly & steadily it is coming true. I am so happy for you, you deserve all the happiness in life. Asha

Katrina: I agree with will completly when you start living in attitude of gratitude life does not seem that bad & you can start living enjoying your today the way it is rather than wishing it was differnt than it was. not having your left hand at your disposable does not make you less of human, & you are still worth the millions cause you are still here. Asha

Dyan: great news, keep it up & follow the same routine, its easier that way for everybody. Asha

Sue: I love your raw, true & thought provoking blogs, from your blogs I always learn what my soulmate must be going through when I am encountering pothole on our road's journey. Ra & your Mum are so lucky to have you in their life. I know it feels good to be loved. I am sure your older sn will come around in his own time there is saying blood runs thicker than water, he will come around hopefully sooner than later. Though having other loving children like Trevor & your daughter can lighten up the load. Soon new baby will be tugging at your heart strings. hugs, Asha

Fred: thanks for sharing this lovely thoughts. I believe because of thoughts like this you are doing so well in your recovery after solid close to 8 years like me. Asha

Lydia: welcome home, though I know now for you PR is home, but ofcourse we all move away from one place & make other place our home. I am sure your kids & monsters must have delighted to have you back like us. Asha

I am reading this great book broken open by elisabeth lesser, and one of the chapter in the book talks about how we are all bozos on the bus so we might as well sit back and enjoy the ride. It's such a profound statement, I want to write down so that I don't forget this important statement. I suffer from similar bozo syndrome where I think every other person on the bus has it all in control & has never done any mistakes in their life, and they are perfect spouse, mother & has never done any mistakes in life, as written beautifully in the book & I quote" we are all half baked experiments mistake prone beings, born without instruction book into complex world. none of us are models of perfect behaviour we have all betrayed and had been betrayed; we are known to be egotistical,unreliable,lethargic and stingy & each one of us has awakened in the middle of night worrying about everything from kids, money to wrinkled skin. In other words we are all bozos on the bus" I feel This is such freeing stetement If we are all bozos on the bus then we can leave down our pretense of knowing all & all perfect & get on being bozos without embarassment and resistance. It is so much easy to work on our rough edges with forgiving heart. I agree with author where she says imagine how freeing it would be to take a more compassionate and comedic view of the human conditions- not as a way to deny our defects but as a way to welcome them as part of human operation system. I find this view very profound it makes you realize be kind to every one including yourself. Every one is fighting their own battles. something new I learnt so you guys have to learn too lol Asha

Debbie: I am so happy & delighted reading this blog you both are on great journey of accepting & making best lemonade & memories along the way. once you start enjoying every day life you realize hey life is not so good or bad its just different still very satisfying. Asha

Ruth: you are blessed to have wonderful friends like Lynn, though one has to be similar friend like that to get these kind of friends. Asha

one of the mentor in this site once told me about how keeping gratitude journal in her life helped her & how it's beneficial. Which prompted me to start my own gratitude journal & I can see how much it has helped me in my mindset. I feel emitting positive energy around you only brings more positivity in your life. So this thanksgiving I am thinking about how my family, friends & this strokenet family has helped me find joy again & I am most thankful for. hope you all are having blessed thanksgiving with your family & loved ones. Asha