mrsamymichelle

My hubby has found a way to end his insomnia, by listening to CarTalk radio. I have grown to enjoy listening to Click and Clack too. Funny guys and I love the people who call in their car problems. When you have a family like ours, you can learn a lot from the show. WE both have payed for older cars, that run great. And my husband tries to do the repair work himself to save us money. -Amy

Somedays I feel so normal, and other days I feel like a damaged person. I really felt my physical deficits today while at the zoo with my family. I can walk fine, but I guess after so much up hill, downhill, I fatigued quite bad. I didn't know if I was going to make it back to the entrance of the zoo or not. My affected foot toes turn under and I end up walking on my toes. My husband went and picked the car up for me so I didn't have to walk all the way with them to get it. Why do somedays I take 3 steps forward, then 10 back? :head_hurts: I think it was because I was trying to keep up with a non-survivor and 5 yr. old child. I do not like to complain or dampen the fun day by letting my stroke deficits win. I know they would all understand. Today just really showed me I have a new P.T. goal to conquer and fix my toes. I think I may try the local college's P.T. graduate students for help. Easier on the wallet. -Amy

Thanks all, I feel better this a.m having slept a good 10 hours, and 2 cups of coffee. Bring on my day:) -Amy

My brain has been fried by sitting here for 3 hours trying to make Medicare choices. I called a help-line for help. I was given 3 numbers, 2 of which were no longer working, and one was a sex hotline! I swear this Medicare stuff, made me feel like I was learning a new language. I also will not be able to qualify for a Medigap policy until I am 65. I feel like crying and I am still un-for-sure of my choices. Can I just go to bed now? I really feel the lack of competency of my brain damage on frustrating things like today. I couldn't return to a job, when Medicare choices has my brain in a bind. I am going to go cry now. My pity-party is over. My brain is a bowl of mush now:( -Amy

Bill, Congrats on getting out by yourself today. It seemed like I leaped and Bounded, in all recovery areas after I started getting out on my own like you are doing, and it builds up your stamina. -Amy

I really forget how damaged I am until I travel. I guess getting outside my comfort zone takes a toll on my brain/body. We got back from our weekend trip on Sunday late afternoon. I turned my alarm clock off Monday morning in a brain damaged induced drowsy spell. Oh boy, did that start my day off great. My daughter was late for school, on the day she started her Iowa Basic Skills test. If your child isn't at school on time, then they have to wait at the office until the test is over. I took my daughter to school late after testing was over, but she got to make it up that afternoon.TG. I went for my PT/INR and it was way out of whack 4.8! My therapeutic range it suppose to be 2.5. I held yesterday's dose and get to go again this afternoon. Today is Parent Teacher Conference's. It is weird being on the other side of the table. I like being on the parent's side of the table instead of teacher's though. I am frazzled at the medi- effing care choices. I discovered that the Rx plan doesn't cover Benzo's. WTH? I plan to call their helpline after I do all my to-do list for the day. Maybe I can find a plan that meets my needs. -Amy

I find myself doing the same things. It drives my husband crazy to come home to see everything I started and didn't finish. I try to keep a check list and check off sa I go. -Amy

Jean, What a good idea!! I was starting to feel a little vulnerable:)

Hum, I had planned on giving out my new stroke bracelets this weekend. I am afraid I am giving them a key to my blog though. Maybe I could change my username, to something not so obvious. Who am I kidding anyway, not very many people have 8 hours a day to play around on the computer. Ahem, I dunno? :uhm: -Amy Enjoy your weekend. I'm off to see my boys(nephews)

Bonnie, Congrats for getting into contact with your old friend! I am happy for you. Do you think when you are finished planting trees, you could come to my yard and plant some? -Amy

Steph, welome to the blg community. It is my favorite feature about his support group. See you around soon, Amy

Bud, WElcome to Strokenetwork. This one of the best places I have found. I am almost 3 yr. post ischemic stroke. 30 y.o. disabled el. teacher. I now collect the big bucks of SSDI . My husband and I mainly live off of love. I look forward to getting to know you. c ya around. -Amy

Suzie-q, I was 27 when I had my CVA. You should PM me when you have the chance so we can talk. I was a 3rd grade teacher for 5 years prior to my stroke. My cognitive deficits will not allow me back to my old job:). I am now 30 and almost 3 years post stroke. -Amy

Last night I had my first phone conversation with my 2 1/2 year old nephew who never wants to talk to me on the phone:(. It was so sweet to hear his voice over the phone. Just to my yes/no questions. Then I heard the precious," I love you Amy, Bye-Bye." Now I need to see him and his brother in person, so hubby, daughter and I are going to go down and visit late Friday night and spend the night with them. Then Saturday get up and drive to my parents and grandparents for a needed visit. I have my energy back from my cold virus, and it feels so good to feel spunky again. A virus can really wipe a survivor out fast, huh? It made me feel like I had just had a stroke. Scary. Oh, Oh, I forgot to tell you that my five year old baby has her first loose tooth!!! I kind of got sad that she is growing up when I wiggled it. Anyone know the average cost of tooth for the tooth fairy these days? -Amy

My daughter asked me yesterday to be the first mom/car in line to pick up after school. All the cars wait in a big string of cars and my baby wanted her mommy to be first in line. I guess to a five year old that says something about you/or your mom. Well, yesterday I got there 35 minutes early to pick up, and was the 4th car in line. I was crushed. Today I plan on getting there an hour early to pick up, and hopefully, by golly, I will be the first-if not,at least I tried. If I don't try again, then the day she is graduating from high school, I will be crying watching her walk across some football field thinking,"I would do anything to go back and be the first car/mom in line-no matter how long I had/have to wait." She is only in Kindergarten once. Okay, I'm shutting up b4 I start crying. -Amy

Last night my hubby, daughter and I went miniature golfing. It was fun, but challenging to hold the putter. I could hold the putter with my effected hand if I held the putter straight up, them let it down easy. My wrist needs to work on Range of Motion. I finally got the hang of the game, and had a lot of fun. I did come in 2nd (and I wasn't wanting us to keep score.) -Amy

Vicky, Congrats on your 1st anniversary, my first was the hardest with the scary moments just one year buried on top of them. I hope as you experience each anniversary you will be able to look back and smile, TG I am where i am now, and see have far you have come. -Amy

Okay, post stroke I have changed a little. I used to be high strung and cry very easily. WEll, last night that side of Amy came to visit. For no known reason I had this feeling like I needed to cry. I don't know why, but I called my hubby to see if he could come home, I couldn't cry until he was present. I started talking to him, and an emotional release happened. For no reason. I don't know when the last time I cried had been. He asked me if the old Amy was coming back. I told him, "Got I hope not." I felt a big relief after I was able to have my crying/can't talk release. My hubby was just sitting looking at me, and thinking," I haven't seen this number in a while." My hubby thinks I am recovered now. LOL! Just something weird that happened. -Amy

Oh yes, I too want something I can never have.. slinky sexy shoes. I miss them and my authoritative clicking sound they would make when I walked in the kitchen. Now, I wear low/no heels and how sexy are those?*frown* WE would have to make this transition one day down the road, just never thought it would be so soon. I donated all of my old shoes recently, and almost cried in pain. I now own 4 pairs of shoes. :yikes: 2 slip on tennis shoes and one pair of Faded Glory SAS look-a-likes, and some white thong sandals from my pre stroke days. At least my heart isn't the only one crying out for youthful footwear. -Amy

Today, I had a nice visit from a surprise visit from my parents. I am glad they came, and it felt nice. It made me miss being around their company. I think it may of been b/c my moody dad was in a good mood for once and it was in my home. I felt like an adult and not a moody teenager, as I revert back to when I see them. Nothing to blog. My parents mentioned a trip we might take to visit my uncle who is living on an island alone and working. You know the fun Aunt and Uncle who never had children, and traveled the world. That gives a survivor something fun to fantasize about.

Suzie-q, A new couch is very exciting. I am waiting patiently for my hubby to finally get through his head that we could stand a new one also. But I can see him waiting another 5 years or so. I am excited about your couch. What color is it? Enjoy the new smell of it before every day odors creep inside the fabric like cooking and ect. Smiles, Amy

I made the call, and told my OT I was doing home therapy for a while.(Yeah right) Gosh, I feel like such a quitter but I really am happy with where I am in recovery. I wonder if my OT saw it coming or not? I feel the out-of-pocket, $50.00 a month for OT can be spent for something different like my new medicare not covered Rx drugs, which I am scared to death about. *Blog subject change* I am very scared to be on Medicare, and not my old BlueCross Blue Shield. Gosh, the decisions about Medicare are hard. I am doing Medicare part A and B for sure, but I am waiting on the other paperwork for the next move. If you have any positive advice I would like it on what moves to make. I feel this is the last leg of healthcare until death sees me out the door. God, that is disturbing to think about. Okay, no more coffee for me this morning. Today is the first day my kiddo has been to school. I feel lost/depressed without her. t.v. here I come. -Amy

Every now and again, I have deep burning stroke effected pain, on my whole left side, and I have always relied on a RX pain to ease it, but to my amazement I tried Extra Strength Tylenol and it worked!! The sun is shining a little brighter today! -Amy

My kiddo and I juts got back from her doctor's appointment and it was proven she doesn't have the flu.Thank God, and it is only a severe virus. I will sleep better tonight knowing her ears,throat and lungs sound healthy and it is only viral. -Amy

I got my daughter a doctor appointment at 10:30 this a.m., with Dr. x (the chatty doctor). Then after our appointment I am calling another mom from dd school who caught the same thing from 'mystery sick kid' and tell her what exactly they have. Fortunately I have no boss to call in at work and say"Can't come in, I have a sick kid", instead my laundry backs up and the dog gets *beep* for having to wait on food/water. I will check back in after doctor appointment. -Amy