suzie-q

Stroke Survivor - female
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Blog Entries posted by suzie-q

  1. suzie-q
    I have always hated the saying, "Things happen for a reason." I don't buy that. Please don't take offense, I just think it simplifies things too much. This is not to say that good things can't come from bad, because I think many good things have come from the fact that I had a stroke.
    That being said, my heart hurts tonight for two of my dearest friends. As mentioned in a previous blog, I have a friend with stage four cancer. She has a one year old daughter, and her chemo treatments have had what the doctors call "mixed results." She is making the trip tomorrow to MD Anderson in Texas to see if they can help her. She is only 34 years old. She endured a great deal of heartache and disappointment to finally experience the joy of motherhood, and now she may not see her daughter grow up. There is no reason for this. Period.
    My second hurt is for a friend who discovered some emails yesterday between her husband and another (much younger) woman. She is, as you can imagine, devastated because these weren't just vanilla emails. This "other" woman is very well aware he is married and so they are both guilty.
    Both of these stories make me ANGRY. I want to scream at the universe, "WHY ARE THESE THINGS HAPPENING TO SUCH GOOD PEOPLE? THEY DON'T DESERVE THIS. NO ONE DOES."
    Another friend told me today, "Listen, this isn't about you. Stop worrying about it." I couldn't do that if I wanted to. These are people I love, and I want to help them. And that is what hurts so much. I know there isn't anything I can do to make any of this go away. I know I am not a superhero. I know I can't fix everything. I am not naive enough to believe I can. I have just never been good at watching people I love suffer.
  2. suzie-q
    I was reading CNN as I do most everyday when I get to school, when I discovered an article about Birth Control. To any men reading this, don't freak out...I am not going to get graphic. I don't think I have ever talked about this, but my neurologist tells me it is likely that the combination of BCPs and migraines (complete with aura) are to blame for my stroke. It was an explaination I always believed in completely. I did some research on my own when I first had my stroke, and most of what I read was consistent with my doc. In the CNN article, there is a section that goes over who should and should not take birth control. People with migraines are one of the first groups listed in the "should not" category.
    Five years after the fact, this makes me a little angry. The doctor who prescribed the BCPs knew about my lifelong struggle with stupid migraines! Granted, I was not a very good advocate for myself. I didn't ask enough questions, and I didn't do enough research on my own. I just went in and asked for them, and with little discussion, he gave them to me. I have become an excellent advocate for myself now. I probably irritate the doctors I see. I don't care; I figure they get paid enough to listen to whatever I come up with. I am not beating myself up, what's done is done. What I am asking myself is, "Why wasn't my doctor advocating for me?" We pay them good money to have our best interests in mind.
    The rational part of my brain tells me that there is really no one to blame for my stroke. It happened. It is over, and I thank God every day for the fact that I am alive. The irrational part of my brain is just more powerful today. I probably won't be mad tomorrow (or after I have some chocolate in a few minutes). I just really wanted to get it out of my system.
  3. suzie-q

    Giving it a shot

    By suzie-q,

    I was surfing around the blog forum and read the challenges section. I thought I might try my hand at one of them, and so I decided to make the list of one-hundred things about me. So here goes:
     
     
    1. My favorite pizza is Tony's Pizza in Jacksonville, North Carolina.
    2. I wonder why I like to watch crime shows.
    3. I am the president of my local community theater.
    4. My first pet was a cat named snowball.
    5. If I wasn't a teacher, I would be in the Coast Guard.
    6. I am terrified of snakes, spiders, and being hit in the face with a ball.
    7. My dream is to retire to a place beside the ocean.
    8. I value my family the most.
    9. I named my dog Gatsby after my favorite book.
    10. I believe you are never to old to learn.
    11. I believe in public education.
    12. I LOVE to write.
    13. I was a fish in a past life. Okay, so I don't know about the past life thing, but I really love the water.
    14. I am the only person in my immediate family who has not had skin cancer. I intend to keep it that way.
    15. Mean people puzzle me.
    16. My decedents came here on the Mayflower.
    17. My favorite city is Washington, DC.
    18. I play the guitar. Badly.
    19. I sing in a bluegrass band.
    20. I am hopelessly addicted to chocolate.
    21. I hate laptops with touch pads.
    22. I HATE to be tickled.
    23. I am a hopless romantic.
    24. I LOVE TO READ more than just about anything.
    25. I hate extreme cold and extreme heat.
    26. I have a commercial driver's license.
    27. I get pedicures to have someone rub my feet.
    28. I watch How the Grinch Stole Christmas every year.
    29. I hate to exercise.
    30. My mom is my hero.
    31. I am an unrepentant nerd.
    32. I eat yogurt like it's my job.
    33. I hate reality television.
    34. I never get tired of "The Cosby Show"
    35. If I was the queen of the world...war would be illegal.
    36. I wouldn't mind being a dog (owned by a good owner) for a day.
    37. I envy those who don't procrastinate.
    38. I love Boone, North Carolina.
    39. I prefer the term "survivor."
    40. I had a stroke two years before my mom. I was 29 she was 60 something (it would be rude to reveal her age).
    41. I want to be one of those "quirky" Southern women when I get old.
    42. Steel Magnolias reminds me of every wonderful Southern woman I have ever known.
    43. I broke my arm when I was a kid trying to play "Snoopy" on top of the doghouse.
    44. I took piano lessons for a long time. I am still terrible.
    45. I am an English teacher.
    46. It irritates me when English teachers correct a grown person's grammar.
    47. For a brief period in college, I considered becoming an ordained minister.
    48. I am the oldest of two children.
    49. I think brains are sexy.
    50. I think good grammar is really sexy.
    51. I think good writing is the sexiest of all.
    52. I know the story behind the Kingston Trio song, "Hang Down Your Head Tom Dooley."
    53. Most modern music makes me depressed.
    54. I am an old soul.
    55. Rutabagas (sp?) are delicious.
    56. Mark Harmon is my celebrity crush.
    57. I still love Mickey Mouse.
    58. Sesame Street is still one of my favorite shows.
    59. My nephew is the greatest gift I have ever received.
    60. I love the smell of book stores.
    61. I embrace my sporadic gray hairs.
    62. Halloween is my favorite holiday.
    63. I wouldn't change anything about my life.
    64. Camp Lejune Marine Corps base is built on land previously owned by my family.
    65. Tobacco paid for my college education.
    66. I like living by myself.
    67. It is hard to believe I have been teaching eleven years.
    68. I grew up near the ocean. I don't eat seafood.
    69. I went into the "family business."
    70. My first job was cleaning condos at the beach. People are nasty.
    71. Manners are becoming passe'. That scares me.
    72. I still love the feeling of riding a bike down a hill with my legs out to my side.
    73. I miss playing in the woods.
    74. I still believe in Santa Claus.
    75. I used to be a track coach.
    76. I still read children's books.
    77. I believe in true love and soul mates.
    78. The more I learn about John Wesley (the founder of Methodism), the more I respect him.
    79. I am intolerant of intolerance.
    80. I think music is powerful.
    81. Nature is my muse.
    82. I have eaten an ant. Not on a dare.
    83. I believe in ghosts.
    84. I met Harry Belfonte (sp?) in a NY diner. He sang for us. I was flabbergasted.
    85. I am the least educated member of my immediate family. I have a bachelors degree.
    86. I don't understand the big deal about "Gone with the Wind"
    87. In some ways, having a stroke was the best thing that ever happened to me.
    88. I believe in health care for all.
    89. I am an Anglophile.
    90. Words excite me.
    91. I would rather get a letter in the mail than an email.
    92. Math makes my head hurt.
    93. I am a hothead.
    94. "Trouble" by Pink is my theme song.
    95. I think it is interesting that "dog" is "God" spelled backwards.
    96. I would like to be an extra on Law and Order. I really love Sam Waterston.
    97. I am not very competitive.
    98. I hate meetings.
    99. I believe in the underdog and standing up for the little guy.
    100. This was easier than I thought it would be.
     
     
  4. suzie-q
    This past week was Spring Break, and I spent it on the coast with my mom. As it is about a three hundred mile drive, I see all kinds of different bumper stickers. Some I laugh at, others I sneer at, and others leave me scratching my head. During this trip I saw one that made me worry. It said, "It IS as bad as you think, and they ARE out to get you." Please understand, I have always considered myself a realist, and I don't view the world through rose-colored glasses, but things just can't be that bad. I have been through some times in my life when I thought things couldn't get any worse and so I am not trying to say that people aren't having a very tough time right now. I just can't let myself be that...paranoid or that negative. Life is hard enough without adding the stress of anger at the world. I personally find anger to be exhausting, so I often go to great lengths to avoid it.
     
     
  5. suzie-q

    Spring Fever

    By suzie-q,

    This past Saturday I celebrated my five year stroke anniversary, and it was the first anniversary I chose to celebrate by doing nothing. It seems that I have contracted Spring Fever (the disease running rampant amongst my students) and have lost the motivation to do much of anything. When I awakened on Saturday morning, I was so excited to hear the birds chirping happily outside my window. This was a definite mood booster. When I took my crazy little Gatsby dog for a walk, I noticed that a considerable number of the trees had started to bloom. I love the warmer weather, but I don't love the amount of sneezing it brings. (For the record, I don't like temperature extremes. I am a fall and spring kind of a girl.)
     
    Spring is the most hopeful season. It's a fresh start. It's like a clean sheet of paper in a notebook that has never been opened, and I find that there are very few things that are more rife with undiscovered possibilites than a brand new notebook.
     
    I find that this Spring Fever has accomplished one thing: it has made me more hopeful. I know in my heart that nothing is impossible.
  6. suzie-q

    Just Plain Mad

    By suzie-q,

    I want to start by thanking everyone for welcoming me back to the blog universe and for the kind words you have shared with me.
     
    Now for the mad part. :Tantrum:
     
    In my previous post, I told you about my best friend. Her name is Kathy. Since my last post, Kathy has been in the hospital. She started a new round of Chemo on Thursday, and she was awakened in the middle of the night coughing and gasping for air. She initially thought her asthma was acting up, but by the next day, she realized something was terribly wrong. She went to see her oncologist on Friday. The oncologist immediately sent her to the ER to have her evaluated. They put her in respiratory isolation so that they could test her for various things (including whooping cough). She spent the weekend in the hospital with no definite answers to what was making her cough. There is a distinct possiblity it is being caused by the cancer that has spread to her lungs.
     
    This whole thing is so unfair. In her last blog post, she was starting to wonder what she had done, or who she had *beep* off to deserve what was happening to her. Logically, I think we both know that isn't how it works, but since we are all human, we often wonder these things.
     
    I know she isn't being punished. I know I wasn't being punished with my stroke. I know it. I know it. I know it. And I BELIEVE it. Unfortunately, it doesn't make any of this any easier.
     
    I don't know if I have ever prayed for someone so hard in my life. I am worried that she is losing hope, and without hope...what else is there?
     
    I am hanging on to hope as hard as I can...it's all I have.
     
     
  7. suzie-q

    So Frustrated...

    By suzie-q,

    This has just been one of those weeks. You know, the one that seems to go on forever. I had high hopes for this week. I was able to spend this past Saturday evening with my best friend and her family for her daughter's first birthday. I hadn't seen her in three forevers, so I was really pumped. You see, my funny, sweet, smart, beautiful best friend was diagnosed with Stage 4 Gastro-Esophogeal cancer about a week before Christmas. I was and still am devastated. This is a form of cancer that is usually found in older men who have suffered from acid reflux for many years. My friend is 34 and has never had reflux in her life.
    Things seemed to be looking up for her last week. She had a PET scan that showed that her tumors were smaller and she might become eligible for surgery, and thus, a cure. She had to have a bronchoscopy last week. The results came back on Tuesday. The cancer had spread to her lungs. Another crushing blow.
    Perhaps the hardest thing for me to accept in all of this is the fact that she and her husband had a terrible time getting pregnant. No other woman in the world loved being pregnant as much as this woman. Every stretch mark, every swollen body part, every pregnancy moment, my friend adored. I hate the fact that she is having to fight so hard to stay with her precious child.
    I think about her all the time. She has the spirit of a fighter, and I pray every day that she will beat this thing.
     
     
  8. suzie-q

    She's Baaaack...

    By suzie-q,

    I just checked the date on my last post, and it has been nearly two years since I posted anything on my blog. I wish I had a good reason for not posting, but I don't.
     
    I miss this blog...I think I need the outlet.
     
    As I write this today, I realize that I am about three weeks away from my five year stroke anniversary, and I am feeling bit reflective. The truth of the matter is, I really have been more reflective about things since I had a stroke. This has all resulted in a total personality change (at least in my opinion). I no longer find the need to reach for anger first. Mostly, I try to sort things out before I do anything else. Okay...now I am rambling, and I will stop.
     
    The thing I have missed the most about visiting this site is the community. I really miss the connections to people who share my experience. I still struggle daily with things related to my stroke, and I worry sometimes that people get tired of hearing about it. I worry that they think, "Good Lord. It has been five years. It is time to move on." I have never been a person to really care about what people think and, frankly, I still don't; however, I just don't want to burn people out.
     
     
  9. suzie-q
    Hello everyone! I decided to dust off the old blog and write a little something. I realize from looking at my entries that the last entry I made was at the end of our first semester. This entry is being written one week from the end of this semester! (Okay, so I am not sure what the point in that little ramble was, but anyway).
     
    Things are just as hectic as usual during this all-out sprint to the finish. The difference this year is that I am secretly looking around at teaching jobs in the DC/Metro area. I have told only one person here that I am doing it, and so it feels really good to write it on here and tell someone, because the little white lies and half-truths I am having to tell people about some of the things I am doing are about to drive me mad. I am going to a job fair in Virginia this weekend, and I have had to tell everyone that I am going to visit my sister. I hate lying to them, but small schools are like small towns--If you don't know what your doing it's okay because eveyrone else does. I love the people here, and I especially love my students, but I feel the need for a change. I have always wanted to live in the DC area, and I don't want to wake up one day and realized that I didn't at least check it out.
     
    I thought that I would feel a lot of pressure about looking for a job, but I really don't. Of course it is easy to look for a job when you already have one. I am a little nervous; however, because I haven't interviewed for a job in nine years. I have to keep telling myself that it should be so much easier this time because I have worked for nine years, and my experience should be a huge advantage.
     
    Okay... I believe I have rambled enough!
     
    susan
  10. suzie-q

    A long time coming...

    By suzie-q,

    It has been quite some time since I have posted here. Life is just plain hectic. Honestly, I have missed this outlet terribly, and I have no clue why I have taken the time off.
     
    This has been a very strange school year. We are finishing our first semester today ( yes, I am writing this at school...shhhh, don't tell anyone) and it is about time. This semester has been like the gift that just keeps on giving. We were supposed to finish last Thursday and start the new semester today, but the icy weather had some other ideas. Then we had more ice last night which gave us a two hour delay this morning. So, the moral of the story is this: the semster is now ending 6 days and two hours later than it was supposed to.
     
    I am so glad that the semester break is over as well. We have had teacher workdays, holidays, and snow days, and it is getting old. I did not go into teaching to spend this many days in my classroom by myself. Anyway. Enough about that.
     
    I am so pumped because the construction on the new classroom building here is nearing completion. We should get to move in at the beginning of March. We go to go into the new building itself on Friday. It is so beautiful! None of the walls are painted band-aid brown like they are in this building. I am so very excited! :happydance: It made me rather tearful the first time I saw it. It looks like what a school should look like! :laughbounce:
     
    Okay...that is all from the what it's worth department!
     
    Susan
  11. suzie-q
    I went to see my friend Andy's little grandbaby. He was so cute, but so tiny. I had never been in a NICCU before...it was a little creepy at first. We walked over there, and there he was all hooked up to stuff. It is amazing the technology we have to help little guys like him. He seems to be doing pretty well. The looser father was still hanging around...he makes me wish I was a violent person so he could have a little dose of his own medicine. I am aware, however, that these thoughts don't make me much better than him, but I have to say I have very little use for men that hit women. I think that there is a special place in hell for a guy like that.
    :ranting:
     
  12. suzie-q

    Heart break...again

    By suzie-q,

    :Sob: This has simply been a very rough week. Not for me really, but for the people around me, and so I guess indirectly me.
     
    On Wednesday, my friend Andy called me and told me that his daughter (who is seven months pregnant) was in the hospitial because they feared for the baby because her blood pressure was really high. This is only about a week after he and his wife had to go and move this daughter out of the home she shares with her looser husband because he beat her and choked her. On Thursday she was transported to a larger hospital about an hour away because our hospital does not have a NNICU. Friday morning, he called to tell me that they had done an emergency c-section. The little baby was 2 pounds and 12 ounces. Everyone is doing pretty well considering the circumstances. I am going to go visit them tomorrow.
     
    During all this, another close friend of mine called to vent. It seems a woman whom she has helped get jobs for the last 10 years or so stabbed her in the back. This back stab and other subsequent actions will probably result in my friend loosing a job that she loves. Today we were rehearsing for a play that I am helping her direct, when her cell phone rang. It was her mother telling her that her drug and alcohol addicted son was in jail again for driving drunk. This is his third DWI. The second one already has him serving a thirty day sentence starting December first. This time he will likely go to prison. My friend who is one the strongest people I know turned to me and said, "I must be the worst mother in the world, or I am being punished for something." I wish there was some way I could help her understand that none of this is her fault.
     
    I hate to see my friends suffer. I wish there was more I could do for them to help take away their pain.
     
    We also experienced the death of a former student this week as well.
     
    All of this makes me feel like such a heel when I bemoan that fact that my life is less than perfect, because so many other people have much tougher rows to hoe than I do. I am so heartbroken for my friends I don't know what to do.
     
    :Sob:
  13. suzie-q

    Life is precious...

    By suzie-q,

    I think something that all of us on here can appreciate is the fragility of life. I know I have a new appreciation for life thanks to my stroke. Sometimes however, I think we need to be reminded. As I write this, one of my very best friends is lying in a hospital bed. She called me Sunday afternoon and said that her abdomen was hurting really bad and that if she stayed still it didn't hurt. She didn't say much about it, and I didn't pursue it because we changed subjects and never came back to it. Monday morning, I woke up feeling very sick and stayed home from work. Around noon, my friend called to tell me that she was going to the doctor because her stomach pain had gotten much worse. She was very concerned that it was her appendix. The doctor had a similar concern, and sent her to have a CT scan and an ultrasound. They determined that it was not her appendix, but a tumor on her right ovary. She had surgery today to remove the tumor.
     
    Before my stroke, I used to think that me and my friends were just too young for tumors and strokes and other bad things, but I have learned that nothing is further from the truth. Life is so precious, and we should live it like every day is our last with no regrets. I know I am preaching to the choir here, and believe me when I say that I don't think I have stumbled onto some revolutionary new truth. I think I am really trying to make sure that I myself get it. To many times I find myself looking back and saying, "I shoulda'..." I don't want to be that way.
     
     
  14. suzie-q

    I hate ignorance...

    By suzie-q,

    Okay, so it has been a long time since I have blogged for real. The start to the school year has been quite hectic, and I have lots more to do because of a change in our scheduling. I have gone from having 60 students in a semester, to having about 125. Talk about an increase in paper work for an English teacher!
     
    I decided today that I am really thankful that I am on an anti-depressant/ anti- anxiety. We have been having a very difficult couple of days at school. I will explain, but before I do, I would like to include the following disclaimer: I have always believed that we have a great school with great kids. They are polite and nice and generallly well behaved. I feel very luck to work in such a great school, because not every teacher can say that. All that said, teenagers can from time to time turn into raging lunatics. The case in point happened this week. On Tuesday, some of our "Rednecks" decided to have an impromptu pickup truck/ rebel flag parade through our parking lot. This angered many people including me especially because we couldn'f figure out what the hell they were doing or why. The response by our minority students and non- minority students resulted in some pretty nasty situations yesterday. The nastiest one left me crying for about two hours yesterday afternoon when all of a sudden race mattered more than good sense.
     
    I hate ignorance. Especially when I am certain that all of the offenders were sitting in a pew in church last night proclaiming their profound love for God after spending a day of being ignorant racists. No matter what they say...racism isn't Biblical. It also makes me sick that we teach our students about the atrocities of the Holocaust and even take them to DC to the museum where we watch them absorb all the hate that surrounds such a horrific event, and after seeing that and taking in all that hatred and suffering they don't connect the two. Same hate, different place.
     
    At first, I was angry to the point of tears. Now I am just sad and disappointed that 50 years after the integration of Little Rock High School, an event that we mark this week, that we are still dealing with some of the same crap.
     
    :Sob:
  15. suzie-q

    ASU Mountaineers!!!!!!

    By suzie-q,

    I haven't written here in a while, but I must say that I have been missing it terribly! What an amazing outlet this blog is for me!
     
    I plan to blog a little more seriously tomorrow night or a little later tonight, but I just had to give it up for my Alma mater
     
    Appalachian State!
     
    Woooo HOOOOOOO!
     
    College football legends!!!!! :Clap-Hands: :happydance:
  16. suzie-q

    A new tattoo

    By suzie-q,

    This has a been a great summer, and I am so excited to think that I still have so much of it left to go! We finished our Production of Tom Dooley: A Wilkes County Legend this past Sunday. We had a very successful run. I think that I will be taking next summer off. It is hard to do a show four summers in a row. Gets to be a little redundant.
     
    Anyway...now for an explanation of the title of my blog. Like many of you, I continue to find life post-stroke frustrating sometimes. I already have one tattoo (a fact that surprises even the people closest to me...) I have decided that I want something that permanently reminds me to keep up my courage, and to not give up. I have worked very hard to maintain a fighting attitude through everything, but sometimes, I need a little reminder. I have decided to get a tattoo of the chinese symbol for courage so that I can see it every day and be reminded to hang in there. I know it may seem rather ridiculous to many of you, but I think this decision is a part of the "things I want to do before I die" list that includes a bunch of things that aren't exactly "me" or what others think of me at any rate.
     
    That is all from the what it's worth department!
     
  17. suzie-q
    It is with a very broken heart that I write this blog. Three students at the school where I teach were involved in a tragic accident last night. Two of them walked away without much damage, but the third one did not. They were on their way home from a friends pool party, the weren't drinking, speeding, racing, or doing any of those things that kill kids all the time. A deer came out in front of them. The girl driving swerved to miss the deer, went down an embankment, and hit a tree. Justin was killed instantly. I teach in a very small rural community, and this loss has been devestating as the loss of any child is. My heart breaks for his family, his friends, and especially for the young girl who was driving the car. All reports say that she is in really bad shape right now. I love my job, and I love these kids, and this is the one part of the job that is the hardest for me because it is so hard on them. I hate to see them hurting like they are.
     
    Such a sad, sad day.
  18. suzie-q

    Happy...sorta'

    By suzie-q,

    It has been quite a while since I have been on here. Things were pretty hectic for a couple of weeks, but they have finally calmed down.
     
    First of all, I was saddened to hear about Diane's passing. My thoughts and prayers are with her family.
     
    Secondly, I am glad to see that my friends Asha and Donna are back in the blogging business. I really missed you guys. I was waiting backstage the other night, and realized I had no idea how the heck you guys were doing. I am so glad to have you back around. :Clap-Hands:
     
     
    Last week was one of those weeks I guess we all have, where we are just plain *beep* off at the world. I am over it this week, but I was so foul last week, people started to notice, and I am pretty darned good at hiding my *beep* off at the world weeks. I was just tired and frustrated. Thankfully, it has passed.
     
    susan
     
     
    PS-Donna, I will be thinking about you as you get ready to make the big move!
  19. suzie-q
    Here I was, enjoying my precious summer off and the phone rang. On the other end was a man from the district office wanting to know if I would come teach some remedial students from one of the other high schools for two weeks. I said let me think about it. He said you have one hour. We will pay you your regular salary. In a moment of weakness, I said yes. I have no idea why because now that I have done it for two days, I would like to take it back. Thankfully it is only from 8-12 still gives me some lake time before my rehearsals start.
     
    Anyway.
  20. suzie-q
    It has been a while since I visited my blog. Our students finished last Wednesday, and I finished with school one week ago today. I promptly took off Saturday morning to go and visit my mom on the coast with the rest of the free world who heads to the coast on Memorial Day. I didn't get back home until Wednesday and I am just now getting down to the business of my blog.
     
    My mom and I had a very good visit. She seems to have taken the circumstances of her stroke a little more seriously, and is not trying to do everything all at once much to my relief.
     
    I love summer. I get to do all those things that I think about doing all year long. Yesterday, I went to the lake and went swimming. It was so relaxing. I am going to do it again today, and maybe every day between now and August! :big_grin:
     
    Susan
  21. suzie-q
    I didn't post this in my blog last night because I was getting really tired, and my own blog was wearing me out. Before my stroke, I was in the best shape of my life. My best friend and I would go hiking every weekend at one of the many cool places near where we live. After my stroke, I had so much weakness in my right ankle, that hiking was pretty much out of the question as my friend is literally a full foot shorter than I am (I am 5'11 and she is 4'11) and I couldn't see her being able to drag my sorry butt out of the woods if my ankle decided that enough was enough. I have worked a great deal in the last couple of years to get it back to normal. My doctor tells me that it will never be completely normal again and I will have to learn to live with it. I said okay and decided that I was going hiking. I did...with no problems! WOOOHOOO!
     
    I feel go good this morning, I can't help but smile! :big_grin: :big_grin: :big_grin: :big_grin:
  22. suzie-q
    It seems like a long time since I posted anything on my blog. Of course, it is the end of the year. We started exams on Friday and the students finish on Wednesday. I have to work until Friday.
     
    It has been a strange week. On Thursday morning, one of the friends I carpool to work with told us that her brother was really sick and had been put in the hospital on Wednesday night. They thought it was pancreatitis (sp?). She took her planning time that morning to go visit him. They told her then that it was the final stages of cirrhosis and that he probably wouldn't live for the next 24 hours. The next morning she called me about six to tell me that she wouldn't be at work that day because he was declining quickly. He passed away around noon on Friday. He was so young (fifty). His family is so devastated right now.
     
    I live about a block from my church and the parsonage. My minister told us this morning that someone had propped a trashcan full of water in front of his door so that when he opened the door the water dumped inside the house. This did not come as a surprise to me as we have teenagers wandering all over the place unsupervised. I teach teenagers, I know this isn't good. Anyway, while the police were in his dining room filliing out the report, a lady from my church who was visiting, noticed a man hanging around this corner near the church building. The police officer went out to check on the man and they talked for about twenty minutes before a struggle occured between the two men. It turns out that this man was planning to take his own life right there. If the officer had not been at the parsonage filling out the trash can report, he wouldn't have found this man and kept him from killing himself. I think maybe God was looking out for that man.
     
    Anyway. I think I have rambled quite enough for one night.
     
    susan
  23. suzie-q

    Bad News...

    By suzie-q,

    I mentioned in an earlier blog that my mom was having TIA's and they were making her really sick. Her doctor finally had her get some extensive tests done. She got results yesterday, and it wasn't particularly good news. It turns out that she actually had a stroke about two weeks ago. She doesn't have any residual effects, but her doctor is really concerned. He has changed her meds and stuff.
     
    I am freaking out, quite frankly. Very little scares me more than me or someone I know having a stroke. It terrifies me and is part of the reason that I am on medication and probably will be for the rest of my life.
     
     
  24. suzie-q
    There aren't many things that make me get on my soapbox...but this is one of them!
     
    I was standing in line at Walgreens to ask the pharmacist a question. There was a woman in front of me who was picking up her perscription. I was not trying to listen, but it was impossiblel to avoid. When the guy told her the total, she asked him, "Isn't it covered?" He told her that some things just weren't covered by whatever insurance it was that she had. She responded with, "Well, I guess I will will hold off on that one and get it later." She stuck her hands in her pocket and walked away. This makes me mad. Prescriptions should not be a privelege, and neither should good health care. Taking care of your health or someone elses health should not be something limited to people who can afford it.
     
    I have never understood how this makes sense at all! I teach in a very rural community. Many of students rely on us at school for their nutrition and their health care. These are the people I worry about the most. What are they supposed to do during the summer?
     
    I am just frustrated with the system of health care in america, and I have been thinking about it a lot since we were signing up for our supplemental insurance policies at work yesterday.
     
    Sorry...this was just something I had to get out of my system!
  25. suzie-q
    If you have never been in a high school at the end of the year...then you haven't really lived. You know how people seem to behave strangely when the moon is full? It is like a full moon every day.
     
    I swear, everything I had planned to do today has not worked out leaving me with very little time to find other options. AND my problem today has not been with the children, it has been with the grown people. I mean, how many idiots can you fit into this building without causing some sort of cosmic disaster?
     
    I just keep chanting quietly to myself, "11 more days, 11more days..."