swilkinson

Sounds like a nightmare for you. BUT you have the implant so life should get better. I think it is so much harder without someone to advocate for you as I did for Ray. I wish there was someone who could make!e all of this easier for you. (((hugs)))

Pam, some of what you are going through I understand, some is your personal life story. I hate that you have so little control over what happens to you. I hate that the nurses make no effort to understand what you are going through. I hope the procedure helps, does what it is supposed to do. (((hugs)))

I've just joined the National Trust so I am looking forward to seeing some older homes set up as museums, probably in Sydney, and exploring some of the domestic history of the last century. It is good to recognize the difference between the life back then and the life we have now. Thanks Tracy for that reminder.

A year later and looking forward to this coming weekend when we women gather again for the WAGS Women's weekend. Thanks be for surviving another year.

Wonderful news, great family event. Congratulations all round. Love your adventurous spirit Kelli and your forgiving nature.

There are friends that can turn into enemies, I have had a similar experience, but yours is most difficult being your room mate. Just go on as best you can. Love the blind man as a friend, a fellow sufferer and someone who loves you. Love is important in our lives whoever and wherever we are.

So sorry Pam, all of this would not happen in a perfect world. (((hugs)))

I have been blogging for a long time. I did it initially for a way to expressing the feelings I felt bottled up inside me. I continued after Ray died as I wanted to be a support to others. I have a blog on a widows site too. I never wanted to make money out of it, just to help others really. I hope you find a friend to help you set up a website. Good luck with it.

Oh Pam, this is just not good enough and certainly not right, there is no justification for leaving you I pain. It is part of duty of care, a legal requirement, that they give you pain medication as you need it. Policy be damned.

We have just had one of the hottest November days for decades. What a difference a couple of weeks can make. The weather was still fairly wintery when I went out by train to Armidale one of our little inland cities to stay with family friends. The days were warm but the nights were cold and I was glad of the couple of blankets and heavier cover. Then one morning what looked like heavy snow clouds blocked out the sun and it really was cold so on went the winter weight jeans and jacket. I was glad I had gone out with a range of different clothes. Armidale is a University city so I went to the University several times as my friend is doing a Master of History course. Isn't it remarkable to see buildings looking like big splendid piles of bricks and mortar in an otherwise rural setting? Of course this is a thriving town set in what we call the New England district so rolling hills, good rainfall and fertile soil made it an ideal landscape for agriculture of all kinds. That makes for a rich community who could easily afford to build such a magnificent University. Such a contrast to the practical but modern University buildings on my part of the Coast. It was good to get away for a few days, I find when I am away from here with friends or family I am able to see life differently from afar. And it is good to have different conversations and to step away from purely domestic issues. I went on a visit to several historical homes and as my friend is a guide at one of them was transported back into the past to see how hard life was back a century ago not for the nobility but certainly for those who worked for them. Remember the butter churning, wood chopping, boiling up the sheets? And all done by young girls in service who also did the heavy lifting as the house belonged to three sisters and no men folk were allowed. It is good to be reminded that we are so lucky to live now with so many modern appliances to make our life easy. Okay we have to do our own housework but it is not so hard is it? I was woken up early every morning as the house next door had poultry, both hens and ducks in their back yard and the rooster crowed as early as 3 am. I even cooked a couple of meals while I was away, it was strange getting used to someone else's kitchen. But it was so nice to be out in the country, I really am a country girl at heart. Thanks for the memories. Then home and back to the routine. A couple of our older church members now have health problems so I visited one in a local hospital. I did some work in the garden the first couple of days I was home but two very hot days put that activity out of the question. It is easy to do nothing but that is not what I need to do. It must be Spring cleaning time so a minor declutter is in order. ( I think I say that every year about this time). This year has gone so fast with all the medical appointments that so much looks neglected. I wish I felt more energetic but I do feel my age now. More's the pity. On a bright note I had two lunches and one dinner out this week and one was actually a date. (Shhhh! it's a secret.) On Tuesday I get my roster for the Lions Club Christmas raffle and an idea of what else we have to put our names on rosters for. There is still plenty of activities to participate in for church, with the Friday coffee morning, craft afternoon etc. And tomorrow is my preaching day. And I still have the trip out to Broken Hill for Trevor's birthday to look forward to. I like to be busy as long it is practical. There are a couple of medical events to get over, one at the Lymphodema Clinic and one at the Skin Cancer Clinic. And then there is all the planning involved in Christmas. It is six years since Ray's death and much has changed, other friends have passed and l have some newer friends now and a different kind of life. Of course I would swap the life I have now for my old life in a heartbeat if that was an option. But it is what it is.

Happy Birthday ASHA, enjoy the parties and the fun. You survived for many reasons, one of which is to be our inspiration herein the Blog Community.

Well done Kelli, you responded to the emergency, without thinking you did what you had to do. It was a test and you passed it with flying colours.

I am glad you are having peaceful nights. Be sure to go slowly with packing etc you still need to keep the pace slow, to get adequate rest and eat well. Be blessed and happy Ruth.

Tracy, I wish I was a fairy godmother I would send you some of what I have. Just sit tight and see what happens, there may be people who will help you out with furniture when the time comes. You are a good person, helping out your family even though you have so many difficulties yourself. Just do whatever you need to do and the future will take care of itself. (((Hugs)))

How sad, to lose a parent so young. Deigh we all want good things to happen to our kids and grandkids. A sudden death is so traumatic for those left behind.

I just had a few days with my daughter and family, it was nice to catch up with the grandkids as I hadn't seen them since May. My grandson was busy studying as he starts his exams on Thursday. These are the last of his Year Twelve exams and give him his final score important for future employment and access to University entry. He is very focussed but I could see an element of panic which is quite common at this time. My grandaughter is still three years away from that stressful time. She is a good all round student and as yet unworried about the future. Shirley and I went to Gloucester about two hours away to my girlfriend's funeral on Monday. I thought I would need support as this is the woman I had known since I was seven. Jean and I went through school till our third year of high school together and had always kept in contact. She will be missed by many as she was an art teacher, a singer, very active in her community and recognised as an artist Australia wide. I know she is irreplaceable in my life. We had many friends in common so it was good to catch up with some of them. But I will always be conscious of her absence in my life. I am busy with rosters, they rule my life from now to Christmas. In Australia with Christmas, end-of-year activities and of course the coming of summer with school holidays starting in December. Our days fill with beach going and picnics etc so we are BUSY. I don't think the beach will be a big feature for me but when the kids are here I do take them so take advantage of living on one of the best stretches of coast in Australia. The Christmas raffle alone is two days a week out of my life for six weeks. The Royals are here, Prince Harry and the Duchess of Sussex, so Royal fever is gripping the media. They are due to land shortly in an inland city called Dubbo and the population has doubled there. Good timing as they have had rain there so the signs of the drought are overcovered by fresh green grass and they will see it at it's best. This is the fifth Royal visit Dubbo city has enjoyed so it is the envy of many. It is a boost to any little city to host a Royal visit. We are having a Fashion Parade and High Tea at the end of the month at church and I might purchase a Spring garment as my wardrobe contents is mostly old and tired. It is many years since I was a trend setter. But it does a girl good to have something fresh and new to wear. Call out to caregivers... remember to look after yourself and from time to time to treat yourself to something special like a pamper day or a new outfit. All caregiving is hard and you need to look after yourself and keep your sense of self. I am only really seeing that in perspective now. And so I am enjoying slightly warmer days and longer days as we are now on Daylight Saving time. Nice to have a chance to do some gardening that results in flowers brightening the back yard. There seems to be a time for a relax after a long day, this is when I really miss Ray as we used to review the day together. Ah well life must go on.

Enjoy it while it lasts Pam. It is a gift. Let her enjoy your company, you are good for her too.

I am so glad you are in with someone who is compatible, it should make your life much easier and much more enjoyable. (((hugs)))

I have also had the same misunderstanding with my older son, over his leaving his wife and children in the lurch. I do stand by what I said but it was the wrong time and place. Sometimes my timing is way off. It has taken years to get back to a normal mother/son relationship. I hope you can remedy the situation easier than I did. Mostly it just blows over. Keep on doing what you do is all I can advise.

Same thought here - it is what it is. T 'is true events are just events, blame neutral, so I just need to get on with it. Oh how I wish I could think that way when the going gets tough instead of giving in to self pity as I sometimes do.

I agree, he needs to resolve his own issues. You are his mother who gave up a lot for him, now it is time for him to act the adult and see you as the one who needs the nurturing. Oh my dear, if only....

That was a scary experience Kelli, you did well to get through it. Glad you are registered as a handicap driver so they could just issue a warning. Hope this doesn't happen again.

I have not experienced what you are going through. I have only (((hugs))) to give you.

That is a beautiful story ASHA, your husband truly is your guardian angel.

Sometimes I take the hard decisions and accompany someone on the journey to death. It is something that I was trained to do as part of my Chaplaincy training. This time it was more difficult though as it was someone I knew well, the man I went out with for a while. Lyn and I broke up in November 2016 and four months later started a friendship that lasted till last Thursday when he died. He had twelve weeks in hospital and it was hard to see him slowly deteriorate and probably during the last two weeks the quality of life was no longer there. I will really miss him, he was a great conversationalist and we talked for hours over cups of tea and across cafe tables. Once I accepted that friendship was all he could manage because of his ill health we became the best of friends and I am going to miss him a lot. The funeral is on Friday. I have met all but one of his children and step children so will feel comfortable being there. I do go to a lot of funerals anyway but the closer I am to the person the harder it is for me to not be an emotional mess. Apart from that I have been doing some gardening, preparing for summer by doing a little Spring cleaning. This week I have Trevor and Alice visiting so we have been out most days. Alice loves going to the beach even though the weather is still cool and the ocean temperature cold she has been in doing her version of swimming. Today we went to an area with a children's wading pool and she loved it, she palled up with a girl her own age and they ran around together, a great way to burn energy and keep warm. Yesterday we spent the day with Pam and her three children and it was great to seen the four of them playing together. The boys play games Alice can join in and understand with her being so much younger they have to be gentle with her. I think being with cousins is a great thing for Alice. Unfortunately with major exams ahead for Christopher and much to do Shirley and family won't be coming down before Trev and Alice go home. A pity as she enjoys their company too. I may see them next week. The country is still very dry, Trev said kangaroos, emus, goats and cattle are competing for what little grass there is and carcasses litter the roads. Drought is heartbreaking for all our country farmers and my Lions Club among many others is collecting money and goods to send to the country to support farmers and their families. It is probably too little, too late but we need to show them we care about what is happening to them. After all we really do rely on the farmers for the food we eat and some of the materials for the clothes we wear etc. The year is flying by already people are asking about my plans for Christmas. I never know what I am doing this far ahead. Shirley is not moving for at least another year so that is good. I will probably spend Christmas with her family. There is a lot to get through before then. I hesitate to make plans, in the past so many things have gone wrong that for me planning too far ahead seems crazy. Just have to wait and see what happens.