swilkinson

Just wondering what made you delete your blog entries? I have blogged over many years on here and sometimes sit down and reread a blog or two from a particular year to try to remember a certain period of time in my stroke caregiver journey. That way the blog is a record of that long journey Ray and I took together. As I grow older that way of jogging my memory becomes even more important. Keep on blogging so your life. Love the camping story. 

I should think having a lot on your mind might mess with your balance, particularly lack of concentration. So sorry this happened to Carrah. I had a similar experience at about the same age. There are always predators in every generation. I hope with some counseling she regains her self confidence... Unfortunately we can't be there all the time to protect them much as we want to. Congratulations to your son.

Janelle I was discussing the cold weather with a friend and she said she'd go shopping if she could take her doona. I got a fit of the giggles as I thought of all my friends wrapped in their doonas out shopping. It really is warm enough in the shopping centre out of the wind. Besides there is coffee there and for me with friends to talk to,  that is a great asset for a widow like me.

The warmest place in winter  here is my front verandah early afternoon. On Saturday and Sunday afternoon I had two old friends visit. Like the old ladies we are now we looked at the view and discussed the world, our situation, our families etc. It was very pleasant. In this still somewhat isolated situation a visit like that can make life seem much better. My turn to reach out to others now.

That snow ladened southerly brings joy to the skiers but is a curse to the rest of us.

ASHA, I am glad you feel the way you do about your life experiences, good and bad. It is a sign of maturity that you are able to do so. So many struggle to accept something that changes their life as a stroke does. It is good your son is doing so well and making you feel happy with the way he has turned out. Keep on doing what you are doing, it seems to be working out well..

Lesley is very adventurous going to Iceland alone. I am glad she is enjoying the experience. And that you are finding plenty to keep you busy. That honey do list must be short by now, mine has a few urgent jobs on it so I will need to look for a tradesman or two.  Enjoy your time alone. I'll look forward to your account of those trips you have planned.

Tracy if you can keep your sense of humour life is sweeter. Finding something to smile about,  laugh about or store away in your mind for future reference is priceless. I think we survive and thrive if we can  laugh at ourselves too.

Tracy, I reread your acceptance paragraph and smiled because as an aged and somewhat diminished person I am facing the other side of the picture. My thinking is: " while I am still able" my acceptance being of my lessening ability to work long hours in the garden or do three things in the one day now.

Just spent three days at my daughter's place. Nice to just sit and enjoy catching up with family. The weather was cold so inside was warm and cosy. I spent a lot of time with the cat on my lap. Home today to my usual routine. 

Sounds good Heather. If it makes a difference the device is worth having.

Janelle, glad you survived with little damage. Longest I have had power off was 36 hours. Lost the contents of the fridge that time. Good to have you back. Keep well and safe. Temporary 3 day restrictions here in NSW this weekend, I told my daughter we'll celebrate Mother's Day some other time.

I like the idea of the market and cooking day. Cleaning services are needed but the help with shopping and cooking are going to be real time savers for you. When I first realised I needed help when I was looking after Ray I felt so ashamed but when I had the extra care I realised that meant we had a more relaxed life and more time for fun. I hope you are feeling more relaxed now?

"Most things will be okay eventually" really struck a chord with me. It has been my experience but of course being an impatient fool from time to time I've thought whatever it was I wanted would never happen and I often really wanted it to happen without the experience to build up to it. So thanks to people like ASHA who have taught me to go with the flow. Now I am realising that accepting where I am right now is important too.

Nancy we caregivers have an ocean of experience and sometimes we get to share it with others. We often do this with a view to helping them to fast track some of the experiences we struggled through. I find I can still answer a lot of questions but now wait for people to ask them first. There is so much to learn as a new caregiver and you can get emotional overload sometimes.

Why do bad things happen to good people? I wish  knew the answer to that. Experience that stretches us strengthens us. Living through traumatic events in our lives shows us how to go through the process of healing. You and I have been there. So sad we see others struggling but be there for your friend and help her as much as she allows you to.

I am glad you came back to update us Mary Jo, for a lot of people life after caregiving is unimaginable so in some ways people like you and I illuminate that road. The strengths we build up as a caregiver enable us to going living a worthwhile life but the feeling of aloneness is hard to shake. Like you I have not so far found someone I would like to spend the rest of my life with. But I do have a lot of pleasant friends and sometimes that is enough.

Janelle may be without power and phone connection due to the very strong winds that area experienced so I am sure she will reply when she can.

Stay as calm as you can. I haven't been in a cyclone but had a strong wind destroy my cabin and back yard ten years ago so know that kind of feeling. Hope it weakens before it gets to you. Stay safe.

Wow ASHA your husband is an exceptional person. Having a mother who considered education for girls a waste of time I struggled to educated myself. But in the end I have always been where I was needed so I have had a good life anyway. And taking the opportunity to serve others was drummed into me by my father so that has been a great educating factor in my life too. Like you I am able to appreciate what I have.

I suspect my late husband Ray had some of that response to multiple choices so I can relate to that . Everything had to be slowed down for him and I would say something like: " Do you like grape? " Then ask about strawberry etc. Maybe explain that to your wife. Also his taste had change so sometimes what he had enjoyed before his stroke tasted strange after. All of life is a learning curve.

Speech therapists should be available for every stroke survivor. Ray had aphasia late in his stroke journey and swallowing difficulties. Luckily I was connected to an association that helped locate therapists that worked for a basic fee which we could afford. Wish that kind of service was available for everyone.

You have such a good heart Kelli and that makes it tough when you see people in need and can't get help for them. All we can do is give them the help we can. Bless you for what you do for others.

ASHA, so good you have another opportunity to make some changes in your life. Little adjustments can make a big difference. You are going into Spring and hopefully have a better summer ahead than last year. Make the most of your life, it goes too fast. Great to hear you are looking at yourself with fresh eyes, there is always room for improvement.

Tracy, floods are a problem when we let people build homes on flood plains. The rains finally ceased and then the clean up began and our TV screens have been full of those heart breaking scenes. The weather has reverted to the normal range of warm days and cool nights and I am loving it. I am able to get out and about in comfort now the humidity has gone and spend a lot of time in my garden, there is a lot of work needed every change of season. Not looking forward to the depths of winter but am sure I will find plenty to do.

Tracy I have no advice for you. As you know I belong to a Stroke Recovery Group and each individual is that, each with a unique set of deficits and a separate set of problems. What we share is a willingness to listen, to empathise, to hug each other with compassion when Covid restrictions get lifted. Thats all I can offer to you.(((hugs)))

Oh so sad for you Janelle, so hard to lose a fur baby who has become a true member of the family. The pup will grieve too. When we lost our little dog many years ago our neighbour's dog used to sit on our verandah and howl like a banshee. I felt like joining her. It took weeks for her to get over it.