merichsen

Michael, Please don't beat yourself up. This is not something you can just "man up" and get passed. This will take down the toughest of them. My husband is big on telling me to suck it up and actually wants me to believe that the whole tough love thing will actually make me stronger. At one point he did admit (although I'd never get him to repeat it) that if it were him instead of me, he'd never have been able to handle it. Depressing doesn't begin to describe this. This really rips at you from the core. It hurts so deep that the pain is even at times beyond tears or description. You are not crazy or off your rocker at all. The only way I can find to describe it is no matter what ever happened to make me sad or was problematic, nothing ever dampened my spirit and this did. This took away my glow, vivacity and love of life, and I don't know how to get that back. Hanging out with us does help a great deal because we get how you feel, can relate, and know the importance of laughter and a good pick me up since life doesn't do it so naturally for us anymore. Maria :hug:

Diana, Sorry to hear of your scare. Hope you are feeling better soon. Maria :hug:

Doreen, Thanks for sharing that was a good story. Maria :friends:

Bruce, The botox won't do much on its own. You really need to keep it moving and work with it to get the most out of it. Good luck and keep up the good work. The stuff works you will see and be happy with the results of your efforts. Maria :friends:

Doreen, Sorry you're having a bad go of things right now. Hang in, things do tend to turn around and look up. Hope you'll be feeling better in no time and don't forget we're here for you. Maria :friends:

Yolie, As always it's wonderful that you guys continue to find new ways to develop different areas of Taylor's brain and keep her interested in learning while staying motivated in therapy. You're the best. Love, Maria :friends:

Ruthie, I'm glad it sounds as though life is taking on some semblance of normalcy for you. It's a long tough road as you see especially in the beginning, but as you see life does go on and get easier. Happy to hear William is more relaxed, comfortable,and doing so much better. Please keep us posted as life for you guys continues to progress, so you will continue to be the inspiration you are. Maria :friends:

Congratulations Kimmie :Dance: :Clap-Hands: Happy to hear all is well and look forward to seeing pictures. Maria :hug:

Michael, Your entry reminds me of a post from a while back which was debated on the board for quite some time. Do you sometimes wish your deficits were more obvious? Many took that those who were not highly impaired physically looking quite possibly looking for some sort of sympathy. In reality I think the less impaired just wanted to express feeling their needs were being looked over at times because they were less apparent. Unfortunately you are very right in that those of us without obvious physical challenges appear to be fine and are not given the consideration for the damage that was done to our brain. You don't mention what you did prior, but it may be easier to show you are not able to return and therefore qualify. For example I am a teacher and qualified in that due to the fatigue and lowered level of endurance, I am no longer capable of handling the stress and workload that my career requires to be effective. Make sure you go armed with good documentation from your doctor, that is really key. Good luck. Maria

Wes, Very cool. I never quite made it beyond the shallow end. My left arm doesn't work so I thought any attempt to venture would find me examining the gunite around the main drain. Congratulations on your accomplishments. You've worked hard to achieve your goals and are surely inspirational around here. Thanks for sharing. Maria :friends:

Yolie, Inclusion not only enables children with special needs to realize they are part of the mainstream, but it teaches the mainstream that special needs children should not be isolated and viewed as not worthy enough of contributing to the mainstream to be a part. Prior to inclusion replacing the ignorance that formerly governed most educational settings when it came to special needs children, children with special needs were almost cast aside. The fact that Taylor is growing up in an age when that ignorance no longer in education enables her to see the many ways that she is just like all the other children around her while giving the others the opportunity to get to know and appreciate the beautiful, sweet, and loving little girl she is. Glad you and Tootie are enjoying this as well as the goldfish and juice. Love, Maria :mwah:

Mc, I'm so happy for you. As Bonnie said baby steps, but definitely a very positive forward move to long awaited resolution. I'm sure it was wonderful to see him especially knowing now that the ice is broken and he'll be back in your life.

Miss Bonnie, You blog speaks tremendous wisdom as does usually what you say. Acceptance is....living life and enjoying it enough to be so busy spreading your sunshine that the day you stroked becomes nearly so insignificant you can't recall it. Your flowers will bloom and flourish because you are the beautiful rays of sun in that garden, just as you are the warm sunshine and light of hope for so many here. I'm so glad you see the beauty that sprouts up through the dirt from the seeds you plant. Everything and all you touch in your life so greatly from benefit from having you in our lives. Thank you Bonnie for just being you. All of our lives have grown from the sunshine you provide. Love, Maria

Doug, Why do I somehow get the sense that the next leg of this journey may be to move onto the floor with Teddy? Pretty soon you may be sleeping on the floor and Teddy on the bed. Hopefully this weather will dry out a bit for all of us and we can finally get out and enjoy the outdoors without getting soaked.

Yolie, I see you did catch one of a fairy princess and a very beautiful one too. My younger one just got his braces off-would be nice if the tooth fairy left enough to cover straightening the replacements too. :giggle: but it is worth it when they're done.

Yolie, Looking forward to seeing pictures of Tootie bowling. While you're at it see if you can get a shot of the tooth fairy. Been trying to nab that character for years but she's quicker and quieter than Santa and haven't been able to do it. :Scratch-Head: Maria :mwah:

Jeannie, I'm not sure if I'm more impressed with your gardening or your braving the pasta attachment, never even considered it. Just dust the mixer off-it now serves as a decorative item on the counter. Although now maybe you've inspired me. Think I'll wait for an update though on how you did. Good luck, have fun and enjoy! Maria :friends:

Donna, As the door flew open yesterday on the last day of school I heard, "I'M A SENIOR YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS?" implying he gets to do what he wants. My response was..yeah, this was the last year you got to get off easy in life by just doing homework and worrying about grades. By next year at exactly this time you'd better have a course in life plotted out because you're starting on it and things get real serious and intense for about the next 40. Put a little damper on your day? I thought somebody needed to kick him off his high horse and cut him down to size. 17 is ugly and underneath I'm sure the sweet children we bore are still in there. Hopefully we'll still be around to see them wrestle this with their own one day to which warning I'm sure you've heard Not me I'll be a cool mom...as you smile to yourself and think suuure just wait. Enjoy your cruising time and some peace while it lasts. I like the miner's hat idea, maybe you could even go seasonal ~ a Steeler's helmet for football season would be up your alley. It's great you're out and on the road again. Sure do sound like one hot stllyn hot chic too. Maria :mwah:

Yolie, Tootie is truly a gift. She is a precious angel who obviously brings as much joy to everyone she meets as she does our site. As always thank you for sharing her pictures, to see her adorable smile and ongoing progress is always uplifting and the highlight of my day. Maria :mwah:

Katrina, Beautiful picture! You guys are an adorable couple.Ironic isn't it? If you hadn't started out with such a clean slate this year you might not had recognized all the room you'd have for all the amazing people you now have who truly appreciate you and make your life so rich and full now. Always trust in Him God works in mysterious ways. Happy Birthday sweetheart and may all your birthday wishes always come true. Never forget that your stunning outer beauty is truly enhanced by the enormous inner beauty you have. It irradiates in your smile, needs no enhancement, never ages, and can never be taken away. Love, Maria :mwah:

Karen, Congratulations on your upcoming anniversary. Saw the picture of Madison and Kaylee in the gallery, they are precious. You 're not old just likely got an earlier start and can enjoy and reap the benefits commitment and working together maintain a strong marriage and family. Many continued blessings always, Maria

Kimmie, Enjoy every minute of your well deserved trip. Take plenty of pictures of little Jake because you everyone is as excited for you as you are and just dying to see them. Have a safe trip and bask in ever minute of being with the baby and your family. Maria

Since Kathy was brave enough to share her eye browing, I thought I owed it since I thought of her all through this to share my recent toe disaster for a show of support in fellow Lucydom. Nope sorry Kath I'm not dingy enough to break out the hot wax but having been talked into shoes like a real girl. I agreed to live dangerously and go for them. Assuming I wouldn't be sporting them for a bit I thought I had time to primp my toes to be exposed. Well low and behold on the calendar there marked was my son's sports banquet tonight for which they would now need be worn. Something needed to be done and quick. A mere coat of polish just would never do. The hands and the feet always must match without exception so with a French manicure freshly done on the hands, there was nothing to do but match the feet. With my words to dear Kathy haunting me "don't do these things yourself " I began to paint little lines with a hand that never mattered. Your haircut or missing eyebrow has nothing on these feet babe, but at least they match, what...I don't really know. Part of the mess came from laughing as I was thinking about you Kath and how this was payback for my saying the I told ya not to it yourself comment. So Miss Kathy when we're bunking together as little old ladies, we may have found our calling and means of supporting ourselves by providing one handed salon service disasters. I think this is called cosmetic justice Kathy or cosmetic karma.

Ann, Such a beautiful family. I'm sure Matt's parenting skills were learned by from an excellent role model. The hair looks great and well worth the effort of hunting down the left behind iron. I'm sure it'll be the first in the bag in July. Good to get home but I'm sure you're looking forward to your next visit with Bill this time to enjoy the wonders of the boys. Love you, Maria :mwah:

Yolie, It was quite an eventful week with plenty of ice cream and well deserved awards and recognition for Taylor's hard work and accomplishments. Tootie in a tutu is a real killer. Of course she looked adorable in her tankini too, how could she not? She's Tootie and the cutest by far no matter what she wears. Love, Maria :friends: