jjohnson

Hi, My heart goes out to you my dear friend. I am a Brain Stem Stroke Survivor and my journey began November 2003. I can relate to your husband. I can also relate to you ... as my hubby is my caregiver and I know all too well it has not been a picnic here. I feel, in my own experience, I can relate to how your hubby is feeling. For me, I had to grieve for the old me. I long to go back to being the old me, my not being that vibrant person I was, being able to drive and be totally independent drives me bonkers. Your hubby might feel as though he was the bread winner or at least adding a lot to the family and now that has changed. He is still at the beginning of his journey. It took a while to get the proper meds for me. I have been to counseling, however, my hubby would take no part in it. The one thing my hubby has picked up and I hate it to pieces is when he says: WHATEVER..... grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr rrrrrrrrrrr but, hey if it lets steam out for him, so be it. I know there are stages: anger, why me, pity, denial (and it's not a river in Egypt) and the blessing of acceptance. I'm working with God toward the acceptance. There are days I wish I was there, however, I'm still learning patience. I have to love and accept the new me. My life has changed a million per cent. But, the important thing is I am still here. I was not suppose to be here so I have to take what I have left and just reinvent my life. I have lost friends, or I should say acquaintenances, but hey if they aren't sticking by me, I don't need false people. Just give your hubby time, love him and be there for him, he will come around. Just love him when he can't love himself. The biggest gift I finally learned was not to have expectations. The quicker I gave that up, the better things got. Hope this has helped. I will keep you and yours in my prayers, God Bless, Believe in Miracles and SOAR, Jan