BabsZ

Stroke Caregiver - male
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  1. BabsZ
    This event happened Jan 14 2013
     
    Ed has really been stressing about getting the building finished. Seems impossible to get an electrician out to get it done. Eddie is talking non stop about it. He Is explaining to me every detail of how it should be done. Sigh… This morning OEC is supposed to come out to put in a new box for it. The weather is really cold and I am putting on a nice pot of stew but am out of a couple of items I need for it. Eddie said he was going to take a shower so I asked If he wants me to wait until he is finished. He said no its not necessary, so I started getting ready to go. I went to our bedroom to tell him I was leaving and found him laying on the bed. I asked whats going on here. He said he is really dizzy and so I laid down by him and he tried to sit up but was weaving all over the place so I told him to just lay still for a bit. Then he became very quiet…and his face turned deep red. I realize he is not breathing so I yelled at him (Are you ok? Breathe Eddie Breathe) nothing, so I knew I had to do something, I gave him about 3 breaths then called 911. They are on the way but he is still not breathing. He seemed to be almost snoring but I have been with a few people at the last breath and I know what the death breath sounds like and this is how he sounded to me. so I gave him a few more breaths then ran to the front door to unlock and open it for the emergency crew then ran back to him and gave him a few more breaths. A couple of times he was gurgling some and I hoped I was not forcing fluid into his lungs but the thought came to me that the important thing was to get air in his lungs and anything else could be taken care of at the hospital. I kept this up until they arrived. I heard them open the door and yell, Hello? Emergency Responders! I called to them and they had no problem finding us in the bedroom. I quickly told them what had happened and First thing they said was lets get him onto a hard surface, then they lifted him from the bed to the floor. I was pulled aside by a first responder to give them space to work. I had things to do anyway like get his medical list which was in his wallet over the head board. That would have to wait, but I knew I couldn’t so I went to the computer to print out a new copy. The first responder stayed with me and said this is good because it gives me something to do. After I got it printed and in his hands we moved some furniture out of the way to get the gurney in and out of the house, then I grabbed a few things I knew I would need at the hospital. Cell phone, blue tooth and chargers for them. Computer shoes socks and a coat. Then I started closing the blinds, The first responder guy asked how he could help me. I ask him if he could make sure my 15 year old deaf and blind cocker spaniel got out to go potty before we leave. And he did. I continued gathering a few things like house keys my RX meds. I never did get back to the bedroom to get Eds wallet but it was ok because I had printed out the med list. Locked the front door and asked if I could ride in the ambulance with him. The driver said I could but would have to stay really cool and calm. I told him I would be fine, I have had experience like this before and I am good in a crisis. It turned out to be good I was there, they had some questions for me such as, what kind of abdominal surgery he had had and when. And other questions about his medical history.
     
    We would not be going to the heart hospital. He was too critical for the distance. We were headed for Norman HealthPlex. Then the driver was diverted to another hospital. He called the dispatcher back and explained the situation with this patient and how he needed to be sent to a hospital with cardio facilities. They agreed and we were on our way to the HealthPlex. I quickly called my daughters cell phone and told her that her dad had stoped breathing and are in an ambulance on our way to the Norman Health Plex. She is on her way to. From the back of the ambulance I hear, “he is breathing” then “he is trying to talk to us a little bit” That was really good news to me. I opened my I phone and called my church then opened face book. Typed in this simple message…friends. We need prayer . Ed is in cardio arrest. On our way to hospital in ambulance. Its always best to have a good prayer cover and I have a lot of praying friends. A friend in our neighborhood lives at the entrance to the addition heard the sirens and immediately went to prayer for Eddie. She had heard about the health issues he has and always does pray when an ambulance goes by but this time, she just knew to pray for him. Praise the Lord. Miracle after Miracle. We arrived at the hospital. While they were working on Eddie my daughter called to say she was on her way and her husband was at the hospital. He found me shortly after that. He has some medical knowledge and realy helps to have him there. She arrived soon after. I was told they had to Shock Eddie four times and do compressions in the ambulance. But he is alive. He is having short term memory problems. He keeps asking the same few questions over and over. Where are we. How did we get here. Did the ambulance go code 3 with lights and sirens? You mean I missed that? And there is the other question. Is this real or is it a dream? About every 5 minutes the questions started again. By that evening he was only asking them about every half hour. After about 3 hours in the ER he was transferred to Cardiac ICU.
    Everything has been uneventful, Thank the Good Lord! He has had a lot of pain from the CPR but Xray showed no broken ribs. That’s a very good thing. Wednesday evening he graduated out of ICU to a regular hospital room. Today, Thursday, he is scheduled to have surgery to install the pacemaker/De Fibulator device. So we wont go through this again. If he has another episode, the device will keep it from getting that serious. Ed says God just isn’t finished with him yet. He has 5 grand children to make sure they are raised right. We love them all so much.
     
     
    Today is Feb 1. We have been home a week. He is doing well. Has to wear a strap to remind him not to raise that arm. It could pull the leads out of his heart. not good. Now that the big stuff is over, its my turn. Im a mess. Im so good in an emergency, and i get so focused. Then I crash. And it is hitting me. Im doing a little better now. I am remembering most peoples names now. two days ago i spent the day trying to remember my cousins name. even when i came up with the name, It did not seem like her name. I heard someone at church call out a name of a person going by, It sounded like a name i should know, so i asked the lady next to me, she laughed and said, that is your Pastor. well... need to give myself a break. I had a doctor visit today and she told me to give myself some time. This is all my reaction to what happened. There are more things than this going on but i will spare you my insanity. Hope its over soon.
  2. BabsZ

    hello again

    By BabsZ,

    It has taken me quite a while to find where to post. Things have changed around here, a lot. :-) im sure its all good as soon as i find my way around.
    We finally got the building built in the back. Its going to be a place to store our RV, and will be a work shop and who knows what else. Its the one thing Eddie wanted when we were house shopping that this place did not have. Well, it does now. The only thing lacking is for the electrition to get here and wire it.
     
    I find we are meeting a lot of new people in this little town. Its good to make new friends. Really nice folks. Lucky us. We are telling our story about Eddies heart attack and stroke quite a lot. This brings back up an idea we have played with a lot. Thats writing a book. Anyone who reads my blogs knows I am not such a great writer but I am just putting down what happened to us. If I can figure out how to label and save it here, I may post it here as I write it.
     
    Personally I am doing pretty good. Still having a bit of trouble with depression. Although I really believe it is my depression medication. Also i am battling some bronchitis. Sure will be glad when i get over this. I used to have it almost all the time, but I found something that really helps with sinus drainage and the problems it brings. Natural Vinegar with the mother. The brand name on the one I use is Brags. The mother i mentioned is a web looking sediment in the bottle. I take about a tablespoon full with about that much raw honey in a glass of water. Once a day is plenty if im not having any symptoms but if i have drainage or actual bronchitis, I take it several times a day. It really helps. This is the first time I have had the drainage and bronchitis in over 2 years. :-)
  3. BabsZ
    Yes, we lived through the move. That was about 10 months ago. We are comfortable here now. Yes I still have a few boxes of stuff sitting in a closet, waiting to be going through. Apparently there is nothing there I have really miss. LOL Life is different here, living in a small town than it was in the city. My area had become so crowded and high paced. Whew, I dont even like to drive back into that area now. Did I mention that I Love it out here?
     
    Today we went to an all day "enrich Your Life, Senior Conference. I made some new friends and learned a lot. Not to mention all the encouragement and new ways of looking at things. We had a key not speaker, talking on Healthy Aging. he was really good. I had a chance to talk with him today and I had a question I needed an answer to. I have been struggleing with some things and even wondering if I am strugleing with Altimers or something so I asked him. I first told him about some of the events that has happened to me the past few years.. About being a caregiver to my mother as she declined with dementia and other isues, about loosing 5 lose family members in just a few weeks 6 years ago, followed by my niece being diagnoised with cancer, followed by my husband having the heart attack and stroke... Then this man stoped me. He said you have had quite a lot happen to you. he first said to me, ill bet you are having memory problems especially with names and numbers. I said yes. He said you probally have some real sleep problems. Yes... then he asked me if I have had shingles. To which I said thankfully no, but I have had the injection to protect me. He said thats a good thing because you are a prime target for them. He visited with me for quite a while about my other interests and activities. He stressed to me how important it is for me to get out on my own and get involved with things without My husband. I have heard all this before. And i agree. Its not like he is not able to be alone. He has had quite a wonderful recovery from the stroke. Im just saying, how good it was to have someone really understand whats going on inside a caregiver. And to be encouraged to get out and live. And to be assured I am not suffering from dementia or altimers just because I cant keep names and numbers and other information accessable in my brain. :-)
  4. BabsZ

    Moving

    By BabsZ,

    I have been told by many people to start my packing immediately. So i have. There are places in my house that I stoped going to because of the laundry baskets full of clutter. These are the things I have put off for too long. I have not been able to do it. I cant stand to even look in to them. It has just been too hard. But here is the deal, I refuse to move anything like this into my new home. I can not just toss them in the trash because there are important items there mixed in with the junk that needs to be trashed. Am I the only one who does things like this? I dont think so. With the help of my sweet DIL we sat and went through them. It was much easier with someone that facing it all alone. I now have my sewing room all packed and labeled. The guest room has been cleared out to make space to store boxes until the moving pod is delivered. I have packed a very large part of my kitchen. Keeping only things we will use until we move. The garage is another story. I need to get out there and dig into some of those clutter boxes and make a clean place to stash filled boxes. Our weather has been just too hot to stay our there for any time at all. But our weather man said today is the last HOT day for awhile. Its also the offical end of summer but we do know how those indian summer days of fall can be. But im on my way to getting things packed and ready to move.
     
    The problem I am having is, packing noises are really bothering Eddie. Some days its worse than others. I know i am going to get all kinds of suggestions to send him off somewhere. but he dosnt go anywhere without me. :-( we just havnt gotten that going yet, and im not sure we ever will. My chain of thought has stoped right here. I do have a lot to get done. And im doing my best. I even have some friends that have offered to come help me. We need a nice man friend to come take him out for coffee or somewhere for like half a day. I will play with that idea and see what happens. Maybe my son would do that. But our son is having some back problems and cant do much himself. We will see what developes on this. I have to fight against guilt feelings. Cause he acts as if I do things to cause him these problems. He has never said it, but thats how I feel. Ya know, I really stoped living for quite a while. Now i am getting up and doing what needs to be done. We are making a big change that I believe will help both of us. Its going to be a lot of work on me. But thats ok. I just want to get it done and make it as painless on both of us as I can. Im doing my very best to keep the packing going in an organized manor so when we get in the new home things will be somewhat orderly. And not just a bunch of junk thrown together to get it moved.
     
    Thats enough for now. Its easier to just do it than to put it all in words. I thought this would calm me, but typing it out is actually stressing me. IM gonna go pack another box. as quietly as I can.
  5. BabsZ

    Changes on the Horizon

    By BabsZ,

    For may years we have dreamed of moving to a different house. not necessarily larger but one that more fit us. We have lived here for 38 years. WOW. Moved in as newley weds after being married for approximately two years. We had 2 children and raised them. All the while telling them our dream of living on an acre or two or so. Five wonderful grand children have been born and brought to our house, and they keep coming, which is wonderful :-). We have worn out several realtors who say we are hopeless. They think they find us the perfect home and its never THE PLACE OF OR DREAMS. Well guess what? Yes! We finally found it. Our daughter has been looking for us and even she has given up several times. But this time was different. We had just looked at a house across the street from her. It was no where near anything we would ever want. And I had never given any thought to living that close to them. On the way home, Eddie said he was tried of looking. ( like he has a million times) so we were going to give it a rest and not pressue it so much for a while. The very next day our daughter called us and was very insistant that we come see this house. The owner had just put out a for sale by owner sign, she knew the floor plan and was sure this was the one. reluctantly we took a look at it the next day. To our great surprise, It was so close to meeting all our dreams, we decided this is it. It happens to be larger than what we thought we wanted, but we have already decided what to do with the 4th bed room. I will tell u about that later.
     
    When we told the owner that this is THE HOUSE we have been looking for, she was really amazed. The first people that looked at it is buying it. Lets see, it is a house with a floor plan we really like, My sewing room will be larger and has a walk in closet :-D. It has a formal office with glass doors. The walls in this office are painted red. Hummmm we decided we can work with that. It will Be Eddies Military Display room. with our computer and file cabinet in it. Make mental note... buy two nice wooden file cabinets and stash the metal ones in the garage.
    We can hang the military quilt in there, that HE and I worked so hard on... it has a huge master bath room with two sinks, a large shower and a beautiful garden tub. some people call it a hot tub. Im gonna love that. There is a HUGE walk in master closet, a very nice kitchen. nice means large but not too large. But the living room is a big room. Should accommodate all of our family comfortably. It sets on one acre and has some very nice trees. Did i mention yet about my neighbor? I don't think so. We are right next door to our daughter. Much closer than we thought we would be, but we can work with this. And as time goes by, if we need extra help due to health issues as we age, It will be good to be in that location.
     
    Thats my big news. I had to share with everyone. I will cover some other issues in the next entry. this one is getting long.
  6. BabsZ
    I had been invited several times to a friends house to work on photo albums. After visiting with another friend, who was also invited, we decided to go. This friend host these work shop evenings 2 friday evenings a month. She has this amazing room set up. Large work tables in the center of the room with directional lights and fans. She has about everything anyone could need or want to do this craft. I do have a lot of stuff for this as well. Seems only yesterday, but truthfully it has been several years since I have worked on getting pictures in the albums. This was very good for me in several ways. For one thing, I was out by my self, with friends and doing something fun. A hobby of mine that had been put on a shelf (or under a table, in a closet and in the garage) for way too long. We talked, laughed, and actually accomplished something. It was so refreshing for me. I accomplished a lot without having to feel guilty cause my craft room is such a mess.
     
    I think I will go again next time she has this :-)
  7. BabsZ
    Yesterday, our daughter hosted a wonderful family gathering at her home. We started early at our home. Eddie fired up our smoker. He loves doing that,and I am so happy he can do it. He smoked 3 racks of pork ribs. MmmmMMmmMMmm they were very meaty and juicy and flavorful. Around 5ish we were at her home. We are looking at a home in her area, about 30 miles from our current house. So we took my sister, our son and his wife to look at a house we are considering. Then stopped at a firework stand. Its legal to fire them off in her town. I havnt bought fireworks in a very long time. When we returned to her home, we had a very nice BBQ dinner together. Then outside to the firework fun. When I was a kid, we would buy the little black cat fire crackers, untangle them so we can shoot of the individual ones. We would have fun with those all day long, sometimes several days. There are so many things you can do with them. But now, the fuse is so much shorter than it used to be. No more lighting and throwing. I showed my 10 yr old grandson how to light them, and move back. Then other things like, putting it under a cup and blowing it up high.. well, 3 or 4 inches high. It was amazing how quickly he caught on to all the many things he could do with them. For him, dark came far too early. LOL Between the 3 familys, we had quite a firework show. It was really good for all of us to be together and enjoy each other like this. Yes the weather was hot, it has been really hot here since mid june. But we were inside until things cooled off some. After dark we really enjoyed. She lives kind of in the country, at least away from the city lights. It was so good to look up and actually see the stars. We just sit and visited after the fireworks were gone. The kids ran around the yard with flashlights. They were supposed to be picking up the spent fireworks, but they were just enjoying eachother and the flashlights.
     
    We arrived back home after midnight. Yes, we were really tired. But we have today to rest up. It was a Great time with family.
  8. BabsZ
    My precious friend , Sue has been on my case about my inactivity here at strokeboard. She's right. I really should hang out here more. I didnt realize how long it has been since i have checked in. Not a lot has changed. Not really. Eddie has become very focused on a few important things. He had discovered how disorganized I am with the bills. But I am getting them done. Sometimes a late payment, but not usually. You would think after this long that I could of gotten my house in order by now. NOT! I guess im just a slob. I cant even get in my sewing room. I d like to pay someone to come in and just do it, put things away , in an orderly manor. Put stuff that i dont need in a big box or two, ok, maybe 3. and let me go through it. Wouldnt be right not to look, someone may toss out my grandmothers old pinking shears or something of personal value. But the thing is, when I try to do it, old projects start talking to me. Until i get the room cleaned up and back in order, there is not way to be productive. I would just make it a bigger mess.
     
    I did not intend to go there when i started typing. But guess I just needed to get that out. I did go through a little bit of it today.
     
    I need to blog about me for a bit. oh that above??? not really me, thats just the mess. But I have been under depression for awhile myself. back around Janurary, i visited with a psychologist again. I was really having some serious problems with my memory. I was having trouble recalling names of my friends and some of my family. wow, that scared me. My Psychologist just bluntly told me, the only problem I was having was I have stoped living my life. She asked me how long it had been since I went some place without Eddie. Just for my own fun? I couldnt even remember. So she gave me a calendar to start keeping track of what i do, and she wanted to see several outings alone, for something I want to do. I did go do a few things. but lost the calendar before my next appointment. Im working on it, but I am better. I have sat around this winter and gotten fat and lazy. Not good.
     
    I did find a nice diversion from reality, right here at home. I am now addicted to playing an online face book game. Kingdomes of Camelot. Wonder how many of u know what that one is, or even play it. But i am on it way too much. I know i am. Its also a social thing. I have friends there, who think highly of me. :-D thats nice onece in a while.
     
    this is long enough for this time. I will continue later...
  9. BabsZ

    Journaling

    By BabsZ,

    Looking back over the past , almost 2 years... I wish I had kept a daiy journal. I never have kept one, but It would be interesting to see how far we have come and how the tides of change come and go.
     
    I still stand amazed at how he seems to be fine, like before all this happened, but yet, he really isnt. He is doing very well at hideing his affects of the stroke. and also some what in denial. I have noticed this depression. I do not know how to deal with it. After the stroke, he has been very sweet, and happy. But now he has taken a change. I am wondering if it is depression. I really do not believe I am messing up with everything he says I am. He just seems to be irritated with everything. He thinks his cardio Dr wants him off he anti depressant. But in reality, the Dr was just agreeing with him, that it would be good if he could get off of it. And he gets angry when I try to correct his understanding. I really dont know how to react to all this.
     
    After 35 years of marrage, I dont ever want to give up on him, on us. But sometimes, I wonder If i know him. If I ever knew him. And if he really knows me.
     
    I really think if he would see my psychologist, his antidepresant would be changed, and maybe, just maybe... Things would start being better.
  10. BabsZ

    guilty feelings.

    By BabsZ,

    I know I just posted... But He will be home soon. Dont know if i mentioned, He is driving now. It took a bit of doing to get him to go anywhere alone. But he has a weekly depression Class at VA hospital. Thats where he is. He will be returning home soon. I feel like runing away. I dont want hime to see that I have been crying. I dont want to confront him about any of this. At least not now. would rather not ever. But he probally wont notice anyway. I dont think he notices anything about me except what I dont do. Or what I need to do.
     
    I have guilty feelings. Sometimes I think we both would be better off if he had not even survived.!!!!! OMG!!! DID I JUST SAY THAT????? while I am at it, why dont I jsut say the rest of it.... he is much easier to be with when he is a bit confused.
     
    What kind of wife am I anyway? To have such thoughts. :yikes:
     
    Now I am starting to just feel a bit down... That must be my shell coming up around me... OK, I will just go wash my face, slap on some make up, brush my hair... and put on that smile, u know, the one he never notices anyway.... then start tackleing some of the things he says I need to finish... like I dont know I need to finish them.....
     
    Oh, I am so bad....
  12. BabsZ
    I am just not a good blogger. Cant believe I havnt done this since he was in the hospital. :head_hurts: But he has been feeling well, and we have been traveling. We took off in May and I drove us from Oklahoma to Carls Bad NM. Went through Roswell and had a ball there investigating UFO's. Stoped in
    Alamagordo for a few days. I developed a problem with my eye and since he couldnt drive and neither could I, we just rested a few days until I could go on. From there we went to Jurez Mexico. It didnt take much of that to make me thankful for where I live. We spent a day driving through Big Bend National Park. Eddie really enjoyed seeing all the wildlife. Usually he is the driver and only gets little glimpses of it. He is begening to relax about my driving, from time to time.
     
    We bought a new 30 ft travel trailor. We have always loved camping and travel. We probally should have downsized and gotten a smaller one. But this is like a home away from home, and we are very comfortable in it. Our sales man was really good with us and knowing our needs. He worked with me for quite awhile teaching me tricks on pulling and backing such a large trailor.
     
    June, we drove from Oklahoma to West Virginia in a van with my sister and another lady. I think it was hard on him sitting there with the three of us yacking the whole trip. This trip was for a quilting retreat with my intenet quilting group. ON the way back we went through Washington DC and pensylvania.
     
    July we went out in the new camper a few times, local, not far from home.
     
    Agust I inlisted somehelp from my son and we dug a hole in my back yard for a fish pond. I have always wanted one. Eddie was surprised how big i wanted to make it. 6' X 6' circle approximately. Little did he know, I was going to make it about double that size, but stoped there. didnt want to shock him too much. lol. We have both really enjoyed watching the little fish swim around. The pond is winterized now, fish are dormant for the winter. So I am looking forward to opening it in spring and seeing the fish move around again.
     
    We also took another trip. This time we did an escorted bus trip through AAA. It would have been better if the bus had been in better condition, but we did well and had a great time. We went to the Painted Desert, Petrified Forrest, Grand Canyon and Los Vegas. We were really tired when we got home, but it was really nice that I didnt have to drive. We were home a week then I drove us to Kentucky for his Veitnam Regiment Reunion. We try to go to this every year but missed last year because of the heartattack and stroke.
     
    September and October we used the Travel Trailor a lot. We even camped the first part of november but we have it winterized now and waiting for warmer weather.
     
    In the midst of all this traveling fun, we have been taking a class to become Peer Visitors. The hospitals are using people to visit with new stroke survivors to encourage them and their familys. It has been good for us wheather we ever get involved in visiting or not, although I believe we will. We have learned much more about stroke in general, and his. We have met other very nice stroke survivors who have very sucessfully moved on with their lives. Next week, we have our graduation!
     
    Yes, we have been staying busy. Eddie always dreamed of retireing and traveling. Well, thats what we are doing. We have had our challenges along the way. But very happy with how well we are hadling it all.
     
    Ok, I think I am caught up from our travels now.
     
    For some reason I felt like I had to fill in the time not covered before I could move on to currnet blogging.
     
    I do have some issues going on that I want to blog about, but this is enough for now.
     
     
  13. BabsZ
    The last 2 blogs are very close together in posting date because, I thought I had published them but had not. oh well, I am learning.
     
    The infection reached a point that I couldnt handle it at home any longer. Eddie had an appointment for thursday with the urologist. He sent us home with an antibiotic and said call me if things dont get better. 3 hours later Eddie had those awful, violent shiver chills again. It went on for a half hour and I decided to call the Dr. He said to give him some benidrill. It took him another 20 minutes or so to calm the shakes down. But then within an hour he was feeling awful and he felt burning hot to the touch. His temp was 103.6! I caled the dr again and was told to go to the ER. He would call ahead and tell them we were on our way.
    Three hours later Eddie had a room and was reciveing antibiotica through an IV. When my husband is in the hospital, I just do not leave him. Thats why I say "We" were only in the hospital two nights. I feel like we were there a week. His temp at one point was as high as 104.2 WOW thats way too high. Those violent chills were almost as bad in the hospital as they were at home, and followed a few hours later with sweats that soaked the bed. Talk about hot and cold flashes! The main concern was that the infection had crossed over into his blood. Thank God it had not. Eddie said for him this was worse than his heartattack and stroke except for the time he was on the ventelator and the NG tube. It sure took him back again. We couldnt walk down the hall with out him feeling lost, got a lot of things confused.
     
    Now that we are home I can tell his walking is not as good as it has been either. He moves very slow and cautious. Seems his balance is off, he told me he has almost fallen backwards a couple of times. He seems to be relearning a lot of little things , little things, like how our thermostat works in the house, how the coffee maker works and a few other things. But quickly pickes it up again. He is easily irritated at me. I cant hear him as well as before, he seems to either mumble or talks so soft I cant understand and constantly have to ask him to repeat words. He sounds like his throat is very tight. I find I need to speak slower for him to understand me, he says I am talking too fast.
     
    Right now we are both tired.
  14. BabsZ

    All is better now

    By BabsZ,

    As fast as it started, it all settled down. I have my husband back. What a rollar coaster ride this is. He is so much better, about back to his normal self. im talking pre heart attack and pre stroke, mostly. He wouold really like to take over his old responsibilities. But some things, I think I should continue because It is so hard to tell when he starts being confused again. He talks a lot about taking back the check book and bills. Although this is a new responsibility for me, I think I should continue doing it. I fingure if it is already done, he cant do it. So I just make sure I beat him to it. Paying bills as they come in and keeping the books updated. (thats the biggie for me)
     
    Today the house is quiet. He has gone with our son on a little road trip today. I am home alone. There is so much I would like to do while i am alone. I feel like I am rushing to do it. I made myself a list. hahaha There is enough here to last me 2 weeks. Not that he is hard to care for. He is such a talker now and he used to hardly talk at all. We spend a lot of time just talking. Or should I say, I spend time listening. And I love it! But to actually dive into things without interruption is a real treet. I miss him, but I also know he is in good hands and he really needed to get out without me.
     
    ok, I have allowed myself enough computer time, on to the next thing on my list.
  15. BabsZ
    Eddie has been doing verry well over the past few months. Its been about 10 months now since his heart attack and stroke. We have learned how to deal with most of the little problems he has. He has become much more confidnet and physically as well as mentally stable. until last weekend. He seemed just a little disorented. Got a few things mixed up but we all do that now and then, dont we? Then he mentioned he burns when he pees. Ut Oh! He has a history of prostate infection. he was being treated for one when he had the heart attack. Its friday afternoon. Too late to see a Dr. But I call the Cardiologist office and talk with the Dr's nurse. Told her what was going on and that i kept the bottle of antibiotics he was using when he had the heart attack. He also had something to keep the prostate from enlarging, but the cardio Dr said he didnt need them and not to take them. But I thought maybe he needed them now so I was asking. She said she really didnt know but would try to find out. Later that evening he started with hard chills and high feaver. 101 to 102.
     
    Saturday morning I tried to contact his urologist. I know he has an answering service on the weekends and could be reached. But I found out later that someone in his office put the wrong side of the tape in. And the message i got was that the Dr would be on vacation until AGUST 4th. WOW this is the end of Feb and that is a very long vacation. So I went ahead and put him back on those two drugs assuming that would be what the Dr would do. He always had before.
     
    Monday Morning I got hin to the urologist. After he saw Eddies list of meds, he said dont give him another one of those antibiotics. They dont do well with coumidan. His urin looked clear, no infection. But he wants to see him again in a week and retest. I really think the few antibiotics kept the infection from showing up. But why is Eddie more confused today?
     
    Tuesday we went to the Nurologist for a scheduled follow up attp. Dr looked him over good. Looked in his eye for a long time. Checked his balance, and his perifial vision loss. Discussed decreasing his dilantin. Said all looks good, see you in 6 months. Ok, so he hasnt had another stroke or anything like that.
     
    Wednesday he saw his Cardio Dr. Gee we are getting tired of Dr offices. LOL much less the expence. Cardio Dr said we didnt hurt him any by puting him on those drugs. said he looks good. See you in 3 months.
     
    Ok now its friday. A whole week. I cant see that he has improved any. He is getting things turned around in his mind. His walk is very diferent, more garded. he reaches out and tests things before he grabs. Much like he was doing very early in his therapy. He was very agitated yesterday. today not so much but definately disorented and slightly confused. Atleast confused easily.
     
    I hope he will clear up soon. I am very puzzled by this set back or what ever it is. His speach has been very good, speaking clearly and loud. Now it souonds to me like he is talking way back in his throat. sometimes he talks very slow and struggles for some words.
     
    I hope I am not imigining things here. But why would I do that? I want him back to his best. The best he can be. I feel bad about giving him meds he shouldnt have had, but I really tought i was doing the best for him. I have a swarm of feelings going on inside that I cannont explain.
     
    Thats it for now. im at those unexplainable feelings. and dotn know what els to add here. Except for I hope he gets better soon. and I dont know who to talk with about it all.
     
    My mom passed away 2 years ago. sure wish i could talk to her. oh well...
     
    BabsZ
  16. BabsZ

    May28. Stroke

    By BabsZ,

    Stroke
     
    Eddie woke up from his nap and started talking to me. He was trying to tell me something that we need to do. But he was saying all the wrong words. His words were very clear and distinct, more so than usual, but they were all jumbled up and made no since. I told him to take his time, I would be patient and figure out what he is saying. Something was wrong. I didn
  18. BabsZ

    Symptoms missed.

    By BabsZ,

    We were doing a lot of the right things, but a lot of people missed the obvious. Eddie had a shoulder that had been hurting a lot for quite a long time. He had been to several doctors about it and had cortisone shots in it, was even scheduled for an MRI to see if it was a torn rotator cuff. After the angioplasties his shoulder stopped hurting. It hasn
  20. BabsZ

    It's Back

    By BabsZ,

    His prostate infection has returned with a vengance. feaver, chills, and all the other symptoms. He has such bad chills last night, he shook our heavy bed. I made him talk to me during them because he was shaking like he did with seizures. His balance is off, once again confused and disoriented. I dont understand how an infection can cause him to have those problems again. I have so many thoughts and feelings going through me about all this, I cant even slow down my mind to know what they all are. All I know is I am doing my best to take good care of him. And when I cant, I feel so helpless. It seems to me when he starts doing really well, to the point I can hardly tell he has ever had a heart attack or stroke, BOOM! It starts all over again. I remember watching my mom over the years go down a slow spiral of getting really sick and never quite regaining all of it. Like a long slow dance, one step up and two steps down. Oh I hope this is not the begening of that dance again. May be when he gets over this infection he will start improving again. I decided I need to pay some attention to me. I made an appointment with the Psychologist I met with when my mother passed away. I was so overloaded then. we had 5 close deaths within 6 weeks. I dont want to tell him about my appt. But I just dont think he would understand that I need to do this, and i dont want to start keeping things from him. but I also know I need this. :uhm:
  21. BabsZ

    It's All Good News

    By BabsZ,

    Once Eddie realized I was with him every time he woke up, he settled down a bit. I sat near him most of the time, holding his hand so that I would know if he stirred or needed me. But I was getting tired and needed to lay down and rest. I told him if he needs anything to wave his hand or move his foot. I then pointed out the nurse station adjacent to his bed. There was almost always a nurse sitting at the desk with clear view of Eddie, and if he moved at all, someone would come to him. So I was able to settle down and rest a bit as well.
     
    Good News came quickly. :cheer: They only removed 12 to 18 inches of small intestine. That was wonderful news. No colostomy needed! His kidneys were functioning! First 50% then 80% then 100%. The Doctors were amazed that the kidneys came back 100% and so quickly. No dialysis needed. Darrin started telling me about some of the things he was monitoring and how they were beginning to move toward normal. All was good news.
     
    Eddie was on the ventilator for a little over 24 hours. We had a constant flow of Doctors in and out of the room and they all talked about how quickly he was able to come off the ventilator. They expected him to need it for several more days. He still had the NG tube in to pump everything out of his stomach. But they would not let him have even an ice chip or sip of water. This was one of the most difficult parts for both of us. He was continually asking for water, and I had to tell him he couldn