Robyn

ACK...I hope it wasn't me??!!! I don't think so BUT I figured I'd check in!!! :hug:

Your therapist is right. You will have more and more good days...I swear! None of us really have control over ANYTHING...stroke or no stroke...the Universe...God...whatever you call it, is in control!! I've spent the last year working very very hard on that concept...it gets easier over time!

Sherri...YOU ROCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

CONGRATS...especially on having NO REVISIONS! HOW FREAKING AWESOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Congrats DOC...you get used to it after a while and actually enjoy it when people call you DOC!!!

I'm very very proud of you!

PERFECT!!! Thanks...that really was perfect. That is exactly what I am trying to do for myself! :hug:

That was great! I took out death/dying and put in breakup and I could TOTALLY relate to the phases of grieving and its relationship with time! I'm going to copy that, if you don't mind, and send it to my life coach who's mother died about 3 weeks ago!

I agree Jean!!! COMPLETELY AND TOTALLY!

YAHOO!!! You took control...that is AWESOME...you figured out a solution to your situation and it worked out perfectly. You could've easily have just crawled back into bed but you said "how can I solve this?" you walked towards the problem...towards the fear...and did it!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU GO GIRL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I think part of it, Sue, is that women feel guilty when they take time for themselves, stroke or no stroke involved. But I've learned for myself that when Momma is happy and healthy, EVERYONE is happy and healthy. Taking the respite will give you a chance to recharge and be that much more engaged with Ray, making that time together all that more pleasant!

Take care of yourself...you deserve it!

:hug:

Yeah...the MJF commercial I've seen as its part of the Missouri/St. Louis politics here. Doesn't affect me as I live in more liberal Illinois but I see the commercials. Limbaugh...well...don't get me started. Can you say VIAGRA dude???!!! I think Limbaugh had his 15 minutes of fame...time to move on.

Mark McEwan is/was the weatherman for the CBS Early Show out of NY, nationally syndicated. I'm glad he's taking the mantle on for stroke awareness!!! Bravo!

Great ideas, gang!

We had a great time and a great visit with my parents!

I remember those "table dancing days" Maybe one day you can get yourself back up on those tables for old times sake!

Jean...rum is very very dangerous...speaking from experience

I know this is hard but I'm happy to hear you are slowly able to focus in on what is causing the anxiety for you. As you are able to focus on it and face it you will slowly be able to conquer the fear. Pema Chodron, a Buddhist monk, tells us to walk TOWARDS our fears, not away from them. Walking towards them helps us to confront them and conquer them...it defuses the fear and makes it more manageable!

Asha is a goddess and she is right...when you start believing in the power of goodness and tranquility, that will help as well!!!

You are making great strides my friend! Believe it!! :hug:

YAHOO!! :Clap-Hands: Bravo...I'll be thinking of you on Friday...let me know how it goes...I can't WAIT to hear!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Dr. Sherri!!!!

I'm so happy for you! Not that you had the stroke, obvious, but that you've reached a place of comfort! This is wonderful and will truly help you move on and reach your fullest potential! :hug:

Here here, gang! I couldn't agree more!

I am so unready to get involved with anyone else. I am THRILLED to be making friends with people and am really enjoying that. It is so important for me to be whole first because as long as I am still mourning an old relationship I can't give myself to a new one. It is not even a consideration right now. This only came up for me because I've met someone who seems to be strongly interested in something more and I'm SOOO not interested and had to make it very clear that would not happen. I was talking to my therapist about that and she thinks its great I am reaching out to make friends and agreed with me that anything else is WAY too premature!! LOL!!! I agree Sue...I've known too many people that dragged their old baggage with them from pillar to post...like my ex-partner in fact!! LOL! I don't want to be one of those people. I'm so glad I'm being supported by my therapist and coach...they take good care of me!

Gracious, I haven't casually dated anyone really in about 17 years! I dated/was married to my ex-husband for 14 years and then was in a relationship with Jane for 3 years right after that. I need a little "Robyn time" right now.

I am also glad to hear y'all say that this is a process...because that is what I've been feeling as well. Each day it is easier!

Yeah...he's a gem isn't he?!!! :wub2: If I liked men, you'd have to worry Asha...(just kidding!!) !! You are an incredibly lucky woman Asha...treasure that man!!!

Jean...I never thought of it that way. That helps. I suspect that's why I'm not ready QUITE for forgiveness yet. I'm sitting comfortably in the anger phase...licking my wounds and feeling aggrieved, know what I mean? I think I need to feel this way for awhile. But I know I'm not one to hold this sort of anger for long...I can't as I feel it is destructive so when I'm really ready...when the head and heart are in alignment, I'll forgive and move on.

Sherri, I agree, I do think it is a gradual process and you don't really notice it in increments.

Asha...I know forgiveness brings happiness which is why I know I am not ready to completely move on and begin a life anew with someone else. Until I can go to a place of forgiveness I know I won't be able to give myself to someone else in a loving manner. I agree with your hubby...and I know these things intellectually...just waiting for my heart to catch up!!!!

Thanks all!

XO

You sound SOOOOO much better! I'm really glad the meds are working for you! I'm sorry about your claustrophobia...how awful, particularly how it manifested...

I think you can block BLOGS from guests seeing them but I don't think you can block the pictures...I think Jean is right. I can post pics of my kids and stuff but my sis freaks about stuff so I couldn't post pics of her and the new baby...

They had rain just about the whole way from St. Louis to Georgia...then it was clear down rt 95. They have no desire for rain right now!!

I'm glad you are thinking the therapist isn't helping...that was MY reaction reading your last blog entry. Your friend sounds wonderful...you need someone to be that hands-on with you so seek out WHATEVER will work for you!!!!

I'm glad your friend made you feel better! :hug:

I used cymbalta with no side effects after the first two days...I was a bit nauseous at first but that disappeared by day 3.

If your therapist feels she can't help you, try another therapist!

It was NOT terror related, sweetie! In fact, it was a NY Yankee of all the weird things.

hang in there...you did great processing your experiences in your last entry!!! Keep it up sweetie...sometimes the only way to get over the experience is to walk right through the pain and emerge on the other side! :hug: