GeorgeLesley

Just a quick update. We have been wondering how I would get in and out of the motor home so we did a trial run today. No problem with Lesley's help I just sit on the bottom step of the side entrance and lift myself up on step at a time then onto a couch from which I can go anywhere I need to inside. The reverse process gets me outside.

Well, the knee surgery went well, but the rehab got off to a rocky start. No weight bearing for a month is the problem. The way the knee feels, I know I could walk on it easily. That would destroy any new cartlege growing so I am doing what the dr ordered. I found out though that is not easy. The knee operated on is my right non-stroke side. So I am now trying to balance on the weaker, less steady left side leg. Crutches proved to be useless. I just do not have the balance to get into the rythem of using them. It was just a matter of time until I fell with them, so Lesley found me a wheel chair to borrow. Now at least I am mobile inside the house between the wheel chair and a walker. Using the walker is tiring because I have to hold the surgery leg off the floor which means I have to completely lift my body with my arms on the walker to lift and then move the left leg forward. Glad I have lost some weight lately! All the upper body strengthening I have done recently has proven useful indeed. The good news is that thanks to ice and elevation and doing the prescribed exercises religiously, the swelling is gone and I have only taken a few tyenol since the surgery for pain. I think the final recovery will be very good. The knee feels better than it has in years, and I can't wait to use it again carrying my canoe. When I got the wheel chair it was obvious we needed a temporary ramp to get up and down the two stairs to enter and exit our house. Friends, wonderful friends. I called one who is a real handyman and asked for help. He came over immediately, made some measurements, and a few hours later it was done. It works like a charm. It is all screwed together so I can easily remove it when no longer needed. He would not take any money. Have I mentioned how blessed I am? Lesley has finished getting the new motor home ready for our trip tomorrow. She will have to do all of the driving. We are planning for her to drive about 5 hours each day. I have located places for us to stay on the way to and from with the help of the internet. We stay at a lot of city and county campgrounds. They are usually about $10 a night and little used. Casinos are also great places to stay and low cost. We are really looking forward to seeing old friends again and making new ones as we always do at these events. Well, that is the latest here, time for me to refill my coffee cup.

The knee surgery was done yesterday. So far, so good. The dr. says all went well and except for the piece of cartlige removal and some polishing up the only other thing he did was drill the holes in the bone to stimulate new cartlige growth. Minimal arthritis and all else looked good. I have taken pain meds only immediately after the surgery and have not needed them since. Lesley being a retired nurse has been pushing them on me but I have been declining. As you know I do not like taking pill, especially if I do not need them. I have started the exercises prescribed by the doc. So far, they feel very good. Were it not for the no weight bearing because of the new cartilege growing, I think I would be walking already with only a cane, maybe. The knee feels better than it has for a long time. No more snapping or popping. I guess that is what makes sitting in a chair all day with ice and elevation so hard. I know I could be walking without much trouble. Anyway, I know for the best long term outcome I must follow the doctor's (and Lesleys) advice and coaching. I asked the doc if we could use our new RV and go camping next week. He said as long as I do the exercises, elevate when I can and use ice on it, and no driving, I am good to go. So it looks like we are going Thursday and returning Sunday. It is about 1100 miles round trip and Lesley will be doing all the driving so we are breaking it up into two 250 mile days each way which should take about 5 hours to do. This is one of the main reasons we bought the one we did, she can do all the hookups and driving if needed. Anyway, that is our life at the moment, and yes, my coffee cup is empty....

Nancy, with North Dakota winters I would put in 5 ft. If the neighbors don't like it, pave the whole yard.

Wow, am I glad to hear that! The friends you have here will stick with you longer than most others you may have.

Sue, I think you will find that old friends and especially ex relatives will forget your phone number quickly. When my first wife died I did not keep in contact with any of her family long. It soon became apparent the only real thing we had to talk about was my late wife. That did not help any of us get through the grieving process. I think you are on the right path, doing new things meeting new friends, new hobbies, etc, etc. Trying to live exactly as you did, and you and Ray did will not work. Best wishes. BTW, as much as we all love you here, I am not sure even being on his forum is helping you get over the past but might just be keeping you reliving past things. Don't get me wrong, we all love you and will be here to help in any way we can. In the end however, you need to find a better path for yourself. In the end, I changed houses, churches, and location. Too many old memories where I was.

So Fred, when are you going to come off some of that money and buy another motor home? We have just signed up for a rally in Kansas in September, and depending how my surgery goes, we hope to go to another rally in Upper Michigan in a few weeks. Come on man buy one so we can meet up! If you would buy with cash there are some real bargains to be had now, and if you plan to finance rates are at all time lows for rv's. You can get 4% even for some used ones. Jump in, the waters fine!

Lately We have been besieged by callers wanting money. Not just the usual charities and groups which I can quickly dispatch or call screen, but friends and family. They lull you into thinking it is a "how is it going" call and then drop the "need money" bomb. I have only caved on one family member and amazingly got it back on time in full. I told Lesley we will absolutely never loan money again to anyone for any reason. The stress of it all just gets my A-fib going and I don't need that. If her mum ever needs money we will give it to her as a gift and never expect it back. All others, sorry, the answer is no. None the less, I am tired of this stuff so I think I might change our phone answering message to "if your hair is on fire and you need money to buy a fire extinguisher leave a message and we will get back to you soon.. All others calling for money for any reason hang up now". How about it folks, think that will work? Anyway, Lesley will be back Monday which is great. My knee surgery is Friday which is bad. Such is life. Some hot, some cold. I must say however, the knee has been telling me lately it is time to get it fixed. The way it has been popping I call it my Rice Crispy Knee, remember snap, crackle, pop? Speaking of cold, will winter ever end here? We did miss most of the last snow storm, but got about one tenth inch of ice overnight. I don't plan on going anywhere until it melts hopefully later today. This is May, right? We are excited about the new motor home and can't wait to get it on the road. My surgery will unfortunately delay that for a month or two. Lesley is excited to have a new "nest" to feather with stuff and new goodies. If I can move safely, we may go to a rally for motor homes like ours later in May. Lesley would have to drive, but that is one reason we bought what we did. She will have no problem driving it. We have already spotted where the dogs will be belted in during travels and sleep at night. Medically no great problems other than the knee surgery and a annoying sleep problem. I have no problem getting to sleep, but after 4-5 hours wake up and have a hard time going back to sleep. If I have nothing particular planned the next day I just tough it out and nap the next day as needed. If we have something major planned, I will take 1/2 of a sleeping pill just to get the last 3-4 hours I really need. I don't like taking pills but will take those as needed. Well, the ice is melting outside and my coffee cup is empty. Soooo.....

Hey Fred, at least you can see where you are going now clearly no matter the weather. At least half way see anyway! Next week is my knee surgery. The surgery does not particularly concern me as much as the recovery period does. Me with crutches is not a pretty sight.

I just did a google search for active release therapy. That took me to a organization for active release. If a therapist doesn't help after a few visits try elsewhere or maybe it just is not for Mike. You won't know until you try. I wouldn't worry about whether or not the therapist is trustworthy or not. Follow your instincts. Good luck!

Cat, I just can't stop. Sorry. I often wonder if I have anything useful to contribute to this forum when I read of the heartbreaking stories I read here. Then a story like you and Mike comes along. If my story can inspire just one person do reach higher and do more, it is worth it. While I was doing active release I was also trying acupuncture (short term help but not long term), the hand stretching device Saeboflex which really worked, and the neuromove estim divice which was not effective for me. The moral of the story is this: I tried whatever I could find. Some helped, some did not.My small retirement IRA is gone, it funded some of this stuff. Was it worth it? As we say here in Minnesota, you betcha!! I was told I might not ever carry my canoe again. Six months after my stroke I carried it. That was six years ago. I still carry it today and I am now 67. I still exercise vigorisly three times a week. Do I enjoy it? Absolutely not! It is an effort to motivate myself to do it every time. But I do enjoy getting my life back and doing what I want to do again. I do not wish to interfere, but I would be happy to talk to Mike and try to motivate or help him if that might help Best of luck to you both.

Cat, If you have found a therapist you are both comfortable with stick with it. I can tell you from my own experience looking around until you find such a person is vital to success. My left arm was curling up and I knew it was just a matter of time until I would lose all use of it. I asked my local therapist when we were going to do something about that. The answer was when you are ready. I searched the net until I found out about active release therapy. It promised to be something that might help me. I called an active release therapist in Wisconsin the closest I could find to Minnesota. He had me do movements in front of a mirror and tell him what was happening. He then told me he could help, but I needed to find someone closer. My search led me to Thunder Bay, Canada, about 75 miles away. Since I was going to pay anyway no matter where I went that is where I went. I told the therapist I did not plan to become his retirement plan, but would continue to come to him if I saw improvement after no more that four treatments. He answered that if I did not see improvement after the first treatment, he would not expect to see me back. I wound up seeing him ten times. The treatments were painful and difficult. I came home with bruises and very sore. BUT I had a smile on my face. The muscles do "shorten" but only because they are curling up. They don't initially anyway actually physically shorten. Active Release stretches them back out. It hurts. But it works. It is not for sissies. I shared my story with a guy in Colorado who had stroked a few years before I did. He had given up on seeing any improvement. He checked into active release and found out it was developed in the city he lives in. He is now traveling the country in his motorhome with his wife. He was ready to sell the motorhome because he could not use it anymore. The treatment cost me about $50 twice a week. I did the exercises he gave me to do in between sessions with him at home. When I told the local therapist about my success he said he didn't think I was ready for anything that streneous. Cat sorry this is so long, but getting your life back is important and worth going thru whatever you have to do. If you are seeing results with what you are doing, good. I would however not give up the search for things that might work better or in conjunction with what else you are doing. Good luck.

Nancy, I think Sandycaregiver might have hit upon something. Enabling behavior is a downward spiral. The more you do, the less it is appreciated, and the more it is expected. Maybe try to find that fine line between doing too much and doing only what is really necessary. Good luck!

Debbie, you are right. About 1/2 of the way thru I realized that perhaps I had indeed bit off a bit more than I could chew. Today I know it for sure. It was supposed to be an exercise day, but I skipped it. Tomorrow I have a long day ahead as I drive our old motor home to the dealer about five hours away, trade it on a new one, and drive back. A long day for sure. Sue, Lesley says "just get stuck in and do it". Well, I did realize I had started something that was bigger than I thought but was determined to finish it. I can get stubborn. Anybody else know such a man?

Sue, I am not sure exactly how to say this, so I hope it does not offend you. I don't really think you would bring Ray back if you could in the condition he was in and what he went thru at the end. Maybe you would like the caretaking again, but just remember what you preach about. He is in a better place now without pain and suffering. Rejoice that he is well now and waits you. Believe what you preach. Hold on to that. As much as I missed my late wife when she left me at far too young an age, I would not bring her back to endure the suffering she went thru.

happy to here your good report, Fred. I have noticed the VA is far better now than it was when I retired 30 years ago. Now you will be able to see your wife more clearly and tell her how beautiful she is!

Yesterday we got 19 inches of heavy, wet snow. Some of the drifts are as tall as me. We have a 1,000 ft long driveway. I need to get out Monday. What to do, what to do. I knew our ATV I usually use had no chance of getting it done. The snowblower could not do it, the snow was too sticky and just clogged it up. I then came up with the idea that if I shoveled a path in front of the snowblower I could then shave a bit off the edge and make many trips up and down our 1,000 ft drive. Hey, I am retired and have nothing else to do today, so why not try it? Well, the plan worked sort of. I did it in 50 ft sections and then rested. Just as I got to the road with the shovel, a neighbor showed up with a front end loader, which is a huge machine with a monster bucket on the front. In ten minutes he had it done. I have decided I shall not exercise today. I will likely have a brew or two tonight.

Fred you are in my thoughts and prayers. I get my payback from you May 10 when I get my knee surgery!

Well, the trip to Texas did not happen. When everyone involved realized I was serious (especially the dealer), we found a way to make the new motorhome happen here in Minnesota. We are trading to old one here and I pick up the new one Monday April 22. Since Lesley is still in New Zealand some paperwork complications arose, but all solved now. We are still getting heavy, wet snow here, six inches last weekend, 4 to 8 more coming tonight and tomorrow. I can't even try to move it. Fortunately it quickly melts in the little sun we get in between snows. This reaffirms why we want to be out of here in the future during March/April and maybe some of May, as well as Oct/Nov. Not good months to be here. Meanwhile while Lesley is gone I have been a good boy and continuing to eat properly, watching the blood thinner levels, still losing a bit of weight, and anxiously waiting to get the new motorhome. Being a 67 year old stroke survivor has made both of us realize that whatever we want to do in life, we need to get on with it. Buying a new motorhome was not the smartest move financially, but like Lesley said "what are you saving it for"? I have always been very conservative financially, and changing old habits is hard, but she is right. This will be our last motorhome and will see us into our sunset, so to speak. Well the coffee cup is empty....

Lovely pictures. Congrats!!

Hey Terry, congrats on being you and accepting that. If when you look at the guy in the mirror you know he is doing the best he can, don't worry about what anyone else thinks.

Hey Fred, As you said you are not getting any younger, so why not get the knees fixed one at a time after you settle down from the eye surgeries? You might as well be the "best" you can be!

Nancy, you must have a strong back because the load you carry is impossibly heavy. I wish you and Dan the best, maybe when and if we ever get summer the attitude will improve. Prayers to you both.

Fred, sorry we will not be able to meet up this time. But we will soon have a new motor home, and maybe you will as well sometime, Our old one we are selling is likely a bit small for what you would want considering you have grand kids that may want to travel with you. I think Nancyl is going to sell hers, it might be bigger. Fred, good luck with the eye surgery, come out of the hospital with a new look on life!

Will do Fred. Still some loose ends to tie up at the moment. Thx!