Hi, Kimmie
It is alright to vent and it's healthy, too. This may be the only resource where you have to vent and you are among friends.
We have in common things we cannot do with our grandchildren. You know what...I made up my mind early on there were things I knew I could do and things I knew my body would not allow me to do. Sure, I watch his other grandparents take him places during the day but I can't (my husband still works) so I read to him. He loves our reading time so it works out great. When he gets a little older and won't run on his own, I am sure his parents will let me take him places.
I can't do the things my sisters can do now but there are things I can do that they cannot. I decided long ago I couldn't be jealous...takes too much time and breath. I love them both.
This time a year ago I had gone through two surgeries, radiation, chemo, had no hair, broke my right wrist and had another surgery, broke two fingers on my right hand, cracked my elbow, and still walked like a penguin from my stroke. There is hope...a year later things are looking up. My cancer meds give me some challenges but I am still above ground. Hey, I just vented,too.
Is there any way you can volunteer? I do so for four groups and being around others helps me realize there are others out there far worse than me. Plus, it makes me happy to be around other people during the day.
Love you, Kimmie. You have had an incredibly challenging past year and you are a survivor!